Today I Woke Up and Saved the World
by SnarkyTheClown
Summary: Connects my other two stories and develops the RemusHermione aspect that sees it's fulfillment in 'If Life Were Normal What Would We Do for Fun'...of course you can read it by itself too...
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone!

So, this is for terrylove…I hope you didn't give up on me completely, I'm so sorry I'm such a lazy-ass, but your review got me to speed it up. 

This is the linker between my other two stories.  Took me quite awhile to write and for that my apologies.  The reason it took me quite this long is that I had to introduce Callah more fully.  You see in Normal, Callah was there to serve a few convenient functions: she was Hermione's roommate (could have used Ginny, I suppose, but whatever) and she served to give Snape a life of sorts.  He started bitching that he never gets any action so I gave him some.  And some drama, just to teach him a lesson.  Callah, however, was borrowed from another piece of (original) fiction I've written and she's a…quirky…sort.  I wasn't so sure I wanted to explore that fully within the realm of fanfiction, so here we have the compromise: I threw in her major 'flaw' (I hate that word, I prefer to think of them as quirks) but didn't really get too far into it.  You'll see what I mean. 

On with the show then, and a huge hug to anyone and everyone who's reviewed my other stuff (I get so excited with reviews, I save them all and check the profiles of my reviewers!).

--aimes

"It has been seven years.  Seven years of joy, pain, love, laughter, and strife.  And through it all, we have grown.  We entered as children, wide-eyed and fearful; we leave as adults: men and women who will stride into the world with confidence.

"On this horizon, as we prepare to cross into a world of choices, we must take a moment for those who came before us.  Our compatriots, fallen in battle; who cannot be with us today.  For them we will always stand firm: we shall fight for our beliefs without hesitation.

"But this is a time of joy, do not forget.  Give pause to thank our professors for their years of patience and perseverance.  And give yourself credit for patience and perseverance.  For my part, the future is mine to own.

"I wish you joy, I wish you luck, but above all I wish you adventure; for nothing great was ever achieved without a bit of excitement."

Hermione grinned at the seventh years assembled before her and stepped down from the podium.  There was a moment of silence, then the hall erupted in cheers.  She walked back down to her place and sat gracefully.  _Hah!  Didn't even trip on the way down.  _Hermione took a moment to scan the teachers.  _Dumbledore's twinkling, no surprise.  McGonagall's smiling like a proud parent, again not a surprise.  Hagrid's crying, how sweet; Trelawny's trying to look mystical and failing miserably.  Awww, Sinistra's holding Flitwick's hand.  Snape's looking nicer than usual.  Did he wash his hair?  …Nope, trick of the lighting.  Lupin's looking—at me.  Wait, why?_  Before she could control herself, Hermione blushed.  _Oh, good one, Mya.  Real smooth.  He's looking at you because you just made a speech, moron.  Okay, give up and focus on the ceremony._

Several hours (let's admit it, tedious hours) later, she was hauling herself back to her Head Girl's Quarters.  From behind, footsteps approached and fell into line with her.  Hermione said nothing till the portrait had closed behind them, then turned and hugged Draco tightly.

"Bloody hell, I'm actually going to miss you, you tight-assed prat of a fairy!"

"I'll miss you too, you bushy-haired know-it-all descendant of squirrels!"  They laughed and fell on the couch.

"So have you made your move, Draco?"  she asked once the spells were in place.  _A rather genius idea, Mya, pat yourself on the back.  Spells that mimic arguments you've had for people who might be listening. _

"No.  He doesn't want me," he sighed dramatically.

"Good lord, you _would_ be the dramatic sort of queer, wouldn't you?  You're worse than a woman, I swear.  Of _course_ he wants you.  He stares at you all bloody day!"  The 'he' in question was, of course, one Harry James Potter.

They were silent for a moment.

"You know Draco, this war won't be fought forever.  One day, you'll be free to love whomever you wish."

"I know…but…Hermione—do you ever wonder?  Do you ever sit up at night and think 'what if we don't win'?"  _Every night._

"Yeah, I do.  But I can't stop too long because I've faced one really shitty fact, Draco: if we lose, everyone I've ever cared about will die.  Well, the ones who haven't been killed off already, anyways."

Draco nodded.  They drifted into pensive silence, with Hermione's head on his lap and his fingers gently entangled in her hair.

Both of them were startled when there was a knock.

"Malfoy, sod off!!  I mean, leave her alone already!"  Ron's voice was enraged.

They both sighed, but neither moved.  "Allow them entry please!"  Hermione called to the portrait, which swung open obligingly.

Ron barreled into the room, Harry followed more quietly.  There was a moment of shocked silence when they laid eyes on the scene.

"Neat spell, 'Mione," Harry complimented.

"Thanks, Harry.  Can't take all the credit, my fairy godfather helped."  Draco smacked her lightly. 

"Watch it, Bushy."  There was calm for a moment.

"Wow, 'Mione, I thought you two had reverted back to the old ways," Ron said after a moment.

"Nah, but the walls have ears around here, if you know what I mean."

"Yeah," Harry commiserated.  He sat down on the armchair and grinned at the pair.  "So.  Are you two ready for a wicked graduation party?"

That was all it took.  Within a few hours, there were people from all houses mingling, drinking, and generally having a good time.

Hermione took one last look, noticing Ginny and Blaise Zabini talking in the corner.  Ginny was fingering the rim of a martini glass while smiling coyly.  Ron and Millicent Bulstrode were snogging on the couch.  _Good thing most of the mini-Death Eaters were pulled out of Hogwarts earlier in the year.  Heh, and Lucius, Zabini Senior, and a few others left their kids to spy.  Milli's 'spying' REAL well!  _Out of the corner of her eye she noted that Harry and Draco were deep in conversation.  Hermione smiled, bade goodnight to Hannah Abbot and Ernie Miller, who were currently occupying her path, and left.

_Ah, to sleep…and to sleep, perchance to dream…_

Three hours later, Hermione hauled herself out of bed, growling.  _Figures I wouldn't be able to sleep.  _She slipped on her flip-flops and pulled a robe around her.  _To the kitchens!  Nothing says sleep like hot chocolate laced with Irish Crème! _

She snuck down to the kitchens where she pulled out a mug and set about making hot chocolate.

"Out past curfew, Miss Granger?"  Hermione froze at the voice.  _Eep.  _

"I couldn't sleep, sir," she murmured softly as she turned to face him.  Severus Snape leaned against the counter, watching her.  His expression was not threatening and Hermione relaxed minutely.  _Easy, Mya.  It's just Severus.  Right.  'Easy Mya, it's just a rabid flobberworm.'  Wait can flobberworms get rabies?  Scratch that, focus, Hermione!_ 

"Is there a particular reason why?" he queried.

"I don't know.  I was just going to have some hot chocolate to help me." 

"Laced with generous amounts of Irish Crème, I have no doubt." 

Hermione gaped.

"Um.  Well.  Yes, actually," she admitted sheepishly.  Snape sighed imperiously.

"Come along, Miss Granger.  Ten points from Gryffindor for being out past curfew and five for being so silly as to not ask for help."

Hermione laughed as she fell into step behind him.

"When have you ever known me to take the easy way, sir?"

"Never, I think that might be one of the things I like about you," he replied mildly.  They strolled down to the dungeons in silence and Hermione followed him into his private quarters.  She'd been there a handful of times since returning back to school after being captured and tortured by the Lestranges.  Snape had become a surrogate father and though he treated her no differently than he ever had on the average day, Hermione had been known to come to him in the dead of night for comfort.  He was always obliging.  _It's like we have a totally different relationship during the day.  I would never EVER mention these visits outside this room.  And he'd sooner shoot himself than admit he cares about me._ 

Tonight he poured a glass of red wine for her and motioned her to the armchair she preferred.

"How are you, Hermione?"


	2. Chapter 2

This one's for everyone who's got me on a favourites or author alert list!  (I just found out what those are, I was fiddling with the settings on my profile).  I'm on five favourites lists and ten author alerts lists!  How cool is that?!  Made my week, I tell you.

Specifically, I'd like to say 'hi' and 'thanks' to hippiechick7897, hand3, GISingerJayne, and Ruby Malfoy, my first reviewers on this story!

To Ruby: I'd love to have more action, believe me, but remember, this all predates 'If Life Were Normal What Would We Do For Fun?' in which Remus and Hermione hook up.  I'm writing another story on the side (which will probably never see the light of day) which has more action in it because even I feel sorry for these characters never getting any.  I worked in some light stuff here for our friends but there's no full-on intercourse, so don't expect it.  Which is not to say they don't have fun…I did what I could, sorry.

Right, chapter two.

--aimes

Hermione settled properly into the armchair.

"I'm…good," she replied taking a sip of her wine. _Ouch, that was terrible grammar._  He waited for her to continue without comment.

"I've survived, against all odds…and I'm happy…it was difficult being back for a couple of weeks, but I got over that quickly.  Draco really helped me.  So did Ron and Ginny and Harry.  It's just…I don't know…after everything, graduation feels sort of…"

"Anticlimactic?" He offered.

"Yes.  Is that silly?"  Hermione looked up at him.

"No," Snape replied simply.  He paused.  "Is there anything else preying on your mind, Hermione?"  _Oooh__.__  Perceptive bugger…where to begin?_

"Where shall I go after this?  I thought I would want to be a healer or pursue higher education, but none of that feels right at the moment.  I mean I could go back to my parents' home and decide from there, but…"

"Albus and I have discussed that very issue.   We feel you would be a great help to the Order…perhaps you should consider it.  You would remain at Headquarters or here until it is decided how your talents can best be utilized.  How do you feel about such a thing?"

"That sounds…perfect, actually.  I want to be involved…I have a very personal stake in this war," she noted.  _A personal stake by the name of Dayrin Lestrange._Her fingers tingled and she rubbed them absently as she was wont to do.  Snape noticed the activity and knew she was remembering her weeks with Lestrange.  He frowned at the memory.

"Yes, I recall.  You will meet Lupin at the train station in three days.  He will take you back to the Headquarters."

"Oh," Hermione said, more to herself than him.  Snape watched her carefully, nodding to himself.  _Remus__._

"Tomorrow you shall meet with a former…student…who will be aiding us," Snape continued.  Hermione noticed that his voice had gone slightly wooden and he was staring into the fire.

_Interesting._

"Sir?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

"That depends on how impertinent it is," he warned.

"It's not about you," she assured him.

"Then by all means feel free," he allowed with a slight smile.

"This is weird, but I've got no one else to go to.  I've developed…feelings for someone.  Idiot that I am.  But…I know he's not right for me.  And I've tried ignoring the feelings and forgetting about it like a smart girl; unfortunately it's not working."

"Hmm…yes…being in love with Lupin could be a problem," he said thoughtfully.  Hermione turned beet red and began to stutter.

"I—uh—well—I know it's not a—appropriate," she managed as she got ready to make a run for the door.

Snape shrugged eloquently.  "It rarely is, Hermione.  I think we can make an exception for you.  After all you've been through, no one expects you to fall for Weasley or Longbottom."

"Thank the gods," she muttered.

"Perhaps you should consider telling him.  I'm not the authority in these matters, but I do know that beating around the bush as muggles say is pointless.  If you are meant to be together or have a fling or whatnot, it will happen despite anything you might say or do."

"You believe in fate?" Hermione asked with surprise.

"I believe the universe will bully you into whatever you deem least appropriate for yourself," he replied wryly. 

"Your life is a cosmic joke, get used to being the punchline," Hermione summed it up.

"More or less."

"Great, so what do I do?"

"You will have plenty of time to decide when you are staying at the Headquarters," he assured her.

"Thanks," she said sarcastically.

"Indeed.  Are you feeling better, Miss Granger?"

"Yeah, I could fall asleep.  Thanks Severus.  Whatever you laced this wine with is good stuff."

"Indeed.  I suggest you floo back to your quarters to avoid the drunken students that will invariably be littering your common room floor.  I do not envy the house elves come morning."

"Yeah, seriously.  Thanks, Severus."  Hermione rose and hugged him tightly.  He hugged her back.

"Goodnight, Hermione."

Hermione went to the fireplace and threw in floo powder.  "Head Girl's rooms!"  She stepped into the fire with one last wave and disappeared.

Snape watched her leave, staring at the fire long after she left, nursing his wine.

Hermione reappeared in her rooms and stumbled into bed, shedding her robe and slippers as she went.  She tumbled into bed with a sigh and fell asleep within moments.

"Bushy!"

Hermione woke a split second before Draco landed on her and rolled off to the side holding her tightly. 

"We talked and we're going to see each other again and we kissed and…fireworks!"

"Mmm…that's great, Draco," Hermione mumbled with a sleepy smile. 

"What about you?  Any fireworks?  I know you snuck off to see Severus last night."

It took Hermione a moment to process the implication.

"UGH!!! DRACO!!! You've got to be kidding me," Hermione groaned, still not opening her eyes.  "He and I talked about my plans for the future because I couldn't sleep.  I'll be working for the Order…I'm not interested in him."

"Who _are_ you interested in?" he persisted.

"Oh Lord, who would have thought?" Hermione sighed.

"Thought what?" _ Figures he'd be the sort…_

"That you'd be one of those terrible people who try to impose the joy you've found in love upon your poor single friends.  Let it go, Draco, I'm not looking for anything right now."  She gave a wicked mental smile.  "I'm not ready."  _Works every time.__  In five, four, three, two…_

"I'm so sorry, Bushy, I should think about that sort of thing, shouldn't I?  Anyways, you should get up and get dressed, we're supposed to meet with our advisors today for our 'career counseling.'" 

"What a bloody stupid idea.  I mean, you're going to be a spy, I'm going to be a bum, and Harry's going to save the world.  Of course, afterwards, we should probably have jobs…" she mused.

"Right.  And on that note, get dressed, Slytherins have been tossed in with the Gryffindors…what's left of us, anyways."

Hermione grunted, rolled out of bed, and padded to the bathroom.  _This is going to be one of those terrible long days that never end, isn't it?  Of course, that's every day._


	3. Chapter 3

Hello again! 

Ed, the Giant Racoon:  I'm glad you like my stuff.  I updated super-quickly for you J

And for Hippiechick7897—a more loyal reader I could not desire!

Callah's going to pop up here for the first time.  Her character may seem more substantial in this story, mainly because I've borrowed more and more bits of her from the original fiction she appeared in once upon a when.  Her main function is, however, as it always was: to interact with Hermione (since she happens to be the star of this particular show).  I hope Callah didn't become too dominating of a presence.  If she did, I apologize, but this wasn't meant to be a work of literary genius, so I don't particularly care.  Sorry.

Enjoy…

--aimes

Hermione sat between Ginny and Millicent in the Gryffindor Common Room, wearing jeans and a comfortable sweatshirt over her tank top.  She settled into the couch and let herself doze until McGonagall and Snape entered.

"Students!  Your attention!"  McGonagall barked.  _Yes ma'am, drill sergeant, ma'am._ Snape began listing Slytherins and the rooms to which they were assigned, according to projected vocation.  When he was finished, the Slytherins cleared out.  Next to Hermione, Millicent grumbled about having to climb to the astronomy tower.  Hermione patted her back sympathetically and Milli sent her a rueful grin.  _Ahh__, more space for me!_  Hermione curled onto her side, putting her feet just off the couch so no one could yell and resting her head in Ginny's lap, who absently began to stroke her head.  _More like her mum every day._

McGonagall began rattling off Gryffindors and their assigned rooms and the lower year students began to trickle off to classes, until only Hermione was left.  The Gryffindors and McGonagall left the room quickly as Hermione sat up and stretched.

"Miss Granger, you are to report to my office," Snape ordered.

"Yes sir.  I do have a question."

"By all means, waste my time," he replied with a grimace.

"After…everything is over, what exactly will I do with my life?"

"And they told me you were smart…you, Miss Granger, will do whatever you wish when this war is over."

"Ah.  Naturally," she said with a small smile.  "Are you walking with me sir?"

"Most assuredly not.  I'm fairly sure you can find your way to my office on your own.  I have other business to attend to."

Hermione nodded and began the long walk down to the dungeons.  When she arrived outside Snape's door, she knocked and entered without waiting for a response.  _Here goes, Mya.  Make a good impression even though you have no idea why you should make a good impression.  Do so anyways, you brainwashed good-girl you._

Her shoulders straight, head high, Hermione walked toward Snape's desk.  Remus looked up from his conversation with a woman and smiled.

"Hello Hermione," he said warmly.

"Hi Remus.  How have you been?"

"Doing well.  It's good to see you again."  They smiled at each other and there was a long pause, then the woman cleared her throat.

"Oh, Hermione, sorry, this is Callah Riese.  Callah, this is Hermione Granger."

"Hello," Callah said mildly.

"Pleased to meet you," Hermione replied.

"Well I'll let you to ladies get to know each other…I've got to go speak to Severus."  Remus excused himself and made for the door.

Hermione sat across from Callah and they scrutinized one another for a moment.  Callah sat comfortably back in her chair but it was obvious that she was one of those annoying people who always kept her spine straight, probably even when she slept.  She had long, pin straight, jet black hair and sparkly grey eyes that seemed perpetually amused.  Her facial features were even and her mouth expressive.  _She's probably got a gorgeous smile, damn her.  She's nice and curvy though…definitely has hips on her.  Well, that makes two of us.  God, she's going to be one of those sickeningly-perfect-in-every-way-yet-so-nice-you-can't-hate-her kind of people.  Never trust that sort.  Hmm…that was a lot of hyphens…_

Hermione was average height, with the same riotous curly hair she'd always had, although it had subsided (marginally) from its bushier days.  Her eyes were chocolate brown laced with honey, her features were delicate, and her body was nicely curvy.   For a (very) few moments she'd envied the skinnier girls in her class, before realizing that men were far more attracted to her hips and breasts than their protruding ribs.  And realizing a moment later that she didn't particularly care _what_ men liked, so long as she didn't have to give up cheesecake.

They watched each other for several moments before Callah broke the silence. 

"Chocolate or vanilla?"

"Chocolate.  Red wine or white wine?" Hermione replied evenly.

"White.  Fiction or nonfiction?"

"Fiction.  Milan or Paris?"

"Milan…"

The back and forth continued and evolved, till they were responding to and laughing at each other's answers and jokes.  Several hours later, there was a lull.

"So what do you do for a living, Callah?" Hermione asked curiously.

"I'm a spy," came the cheerful reply.  "In the muggle world.  Well, more like a paid problem solver.  I contract out to governments to work with their secret services.  It's a give and take, you know?  I generally work for an international syndicate that's trying to right wrongs and that sort of thing, but I do my share of technology-stealing and whatnot.  Keeps me busy.  What do you want to do with your life?"

"Well, I'll be working with the Order for awhile, until this war is over."

"After that?" Callah pressed.

"I…don't know.  I've always been interested in archaeology and history.  We'll see, I suppose."

"Cool.  Speaking of which, I think you and I are supposed to be working together this summer at the Order, or something like that.  Albus just told me I would want to meet you, so I came.  Then again, maybe he just thought we'd get along well.  That's more of an Albus thing to do."

"Yeah, he is a bit…odd sometimes," Hermione agreed.  "So how do you know everyone?"

"We have history," Callah replied with a mysterious smile.  She opened her mouth to continue when the door opened and Snape swept in.

"Hello, sir," Hermione greeted.  Callah stood as he swept to his desk without acknowledging them.

"Hello, Severus," Callah said mildly, a neutral expression on her face.  He looked up at her, his face mirroring hers, and nodded.

"Miss Riese."  He pulled out a parchment.  "Continue."  With that, he was gone.  _That was odd.  What's eating him?  And her…history…hmmmm…_

Hermione tactfully chose not to pursue it.

"So, are you a witch?"

"Well, not exactly.  I'm Other."  Hermione could hear the capitalization of other and raised a curious eyebrow.

"I'm telekinetic and a bit telepathic.  I've also got electrokinetic and pyrokinetic powers.  And some other odds and ends.  Teleportation, that sort of thing.  I…move molecules, sort of.  It's hard to explain.  But I'm not a wand-waver or anything and I'm shit at potions.  Does that make any sense?"

"Yes," Hermione said slowly.  "Move molecules…interesting.  You must be great at Transfigurations.  But I can see how that doesn't really qualify you for the magical world…and overqualifies you for the muggle world…"

"Yeah.  I pass freely through both, which is nice.  It's a bit strange though, not belonging anywhere.  Generally I stick to what I know, though, which is the normal world."  __

_Normal world.__  Interesting how we all see it differently._

"Intriguing," Hermione commented.

"Yeah, I am that," Callah said with a smile.

"So will you be here long, then?"

"Yeah, I'm going back to the Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix with you in two days.  Remus is going back today, I think.  I've got to discuss some things with Albus and Minerva.  And you've got to say goodbye to your friends and pack and stuff, right?"

"Damn.  Packing.  I hate packing."

"Sucks, doesn't it?  Never enough boxes…but I've got a meeting with Albus in twenty minutes.  Let me walk you to your common room.  Gryffindor, right?  I can spot you a mile away.  Severus always said I was very Gryffindor with just enough Slytherin to be fun."  Callah stood as she spoke and picked up a black leather satchel bag, which she slung over one shoulder.

_Severus__ always said?  Really, now?  I think this will be an interesting tale if I ever get to know it.  Oops, answer Mya.  She's staring at you like you've grown an extra head._

"Um, yes.  Gryffindor.  Let's go."  _Smooth like a porcupine, Mya.  Lovely._

Callah did not comment on her obvious distraction, simply smiling and leading the way out of Snape's office.  Before leaving she scribbled a quick note and placed it on top of his papers.  _What I wouldn't give to read that note…_ Hermione watched Callah and followed her out silently, casting a longing glance at the mysterious piece of paper atop the desk.

Callah saw her to the door of the common room and gave a quick wave before starting off down the hall.

Hermione watched her go for a moment then shook herself out of her reverie and entered the common room.  Draco and Harry were talking excitedly as they held hands on the couch while Ron and Millie chatted more sedately in front of one of the windows.  Ginny was grinning as she patted a stormy-looking Blaise on the back.

"How'd it go, everyone?"

They all paused to look at Hermione and began talking at once.  She laughed and raised her hands for silence.  "One at a time, guys.  First, Blaise, why are you looking so…angry?"

Ginny laughed and replied for him.  "His aptitude tests show that he's best suited for something involving plants…like a florist.  Not exactly the most glamorous profession.  He's a bit annoyed that he got stuck with something so…mundane."  Blaise growled.

"What about you two?"  Hermione tried to change the subject, turning to Draco and Harry.

"Well, Draco's likely to be picked up for professional Quidditch, but his aptitude shows mmfmff."  Harry found himself silenced by a pillow at the hands of Draco.

"I'll tell you later, Bushy," Draco shouted as he suffocated Harry.

"Well let him up then so he can tell me what he got placed as," Hermione retorted.

"Auror, what else?" Ron supplied, as Draco released Harry and playfully ruffled Harry's hair when Harry punched him .

"And so did Ron," Milli said with a laugh.  "Which he's been itching to tell you.  I've gotten placed with St. Mungo's as a healing apprentice."

"Oh, that's great Milli!  You'll make a lovely healer," Hermione said sincerely.

"Well, what about you then?" Blaise asked, rousing himself from his sullenness.

"I…haven't gotten placed yet."

"What do you mean?" Ginny asked suspiciously.

"I've been asked to do some work for Hogwarts…I missed the tests, remember?  I wasn't here.  So it's kind of up to me, I suppose."  _Brilliant, Mya.__  You couldn't lie your way out of a paper box._

"Oi, look at the time!  We've got to get back to our common room before dinner to get our stuff.  We'd better not be late again!"  Ron exclaimed.  Everyone grabbed their stuff and sprinted out of the room, leaving Hermione looking confused at their sudden departure.  _Well, he helped me I suppose…okay…get changed for dinner then._


	4. Chapter 4

For Ed, the Giant Racoon, as well as hand3 and hippiechick!

Ed: thanks for the encouragement J

Hand3: I understand about the reviewing—I'm terrible about it sometimes, but I really appreciate that you reviewed the last chapter.  You're awesome.

Hippiechick: You're right, reviews help you write faster J.  Actually, this fic is mostly done…I'm stalled on chapter 14, but we've got awhile to go before that, right?  I just hate posting too much before I'm done because you never know what you'll need to change…

To everyone: I won't be updating tomorrow night since I go in for eye surgery tomorrow morning…hopefully I should have my sight back by Wednesday.  Have fun with this chapter and I hope to hear from you!

--Aimes

Hermione watched as her friends left and turned to Draco, who occupied the couch with a goofy smile on his face. 

"So what was your aptitude for?" she asked immediately.

"Painter.  What were you actually doing?"

"Painter?  That's great; I told you that you're a fantastic painter!"

"Thank you," he said modestly.  "What were you doing?"

"Persistent bugger, aren't you?  I was meeting a woman named Callah Riese.  I'm supposed to work for the Order until the war is over.  After that, it's up to me."

"I see…Callah…why does that ring a bell?  Hmmm…I'll have to think about it..."

"While you do that, I'm going to relax in my room."  Hermione stretched and padded toward her room, kicking off her shoes as she walked.  _The plot thickens.  Heh all I need is a handlebar moustache._

"Mmmhmmm," Draco agreed absently.  _Mentally, he's already in bed with Harry…ugh, don't go there Mya.  Sick.  _

Hermione tossed herself on her bed and stretched out, sinking into the soft comforter and mattress.  She gave a soft sigh of contentment and began mentally organizing herself to leave.  _Return books to library and pack up the ones that are yours…that'll take a few hours in itself.  Of course, that's the bulk of your stuff, so after that it'll be easy.  I gave gifts to all my professors, so I don't have to worry about that.  Gave gifts to all my friends too…oh, except Draco, gotta remember to do that. What else?  Clothes won't be hard, neither will knick-knacks.  I'll separate them according to how delicate they are then charm the boxes when I pack.  Is that really all?  I mean, other than whatever I've forgotten?  Guess so…I should get dressed for dinner…and by get dressed I mean tug a brush through my hair._

Hermione rolled out of bed and pulled her hair up into a quick bun.  Curls escaped, running loosely and randomly, but she ignored it with a shrug and went outside.

"Are you ready Draco?  Everyone leaves tomorrow morning except us.  This dinner is our last here together at Hogwarts."

"Are you getting soppy on me?" Draco asked warily. 

"No," Hermione laughed.  "I'm trying to get you to move your lazy arse so we won't be late!" 

Draco hauled himself off the couch with a grunt and offered his arm.  Hermione took it with a flourish and they began the walk down to the Great Hall, laughing and chatting.  When everyone had arrived and was seated, Dumbledore rose for his end of year announcements.

"Let us take care of first things first.  You are all wondering who has won the House Cup, I trust?  For one of the first times in remembrance, we have a two way tie for second place, and two winners of the House Cup."  Everyone cheered as Dumbledore twinkled.  "In second place we have Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, tied with 415 points."  Another round of cheering ensued.  "And in first place we have Slytherin and Gryffindor with 823 points each!"  The Great Hall erupted in roars of jubilation.  Banners of Slytherin and Gryffindor unfurled alternately, filling the room.  "Finally, before we settle down to enjoy our feast, we must say good bye to our Seventh Years.  You have been one of the most memorable classes in Hogwarts History and I speak for everyone when I say you will be missed."  There was a moment of silence and another round of deafening cheers before everyone settled down to eat.

Hermione sat with Harry, Ron, Ginny, Neville, and a host of other Gryffindors, chatting as they ate.  During a lull, Harry turned to her.

"What was it you wanted to ask me when we came in for dinner, Hermione?" 

Hermione grinned.  Her plot had been brewing for some time and it was finally coming to fruition.

"Well, I haven't given Draco a goodbye gift, and I haven't given you a proper gift either…"

"You gave me a gift.  The helmet, remember?  So I don't get a concussion the next time a Deatheater tosses me across a room or I fall off my broom?"

"That isn't a real gift, idiot!  That's a gag gift!  But I do have a real gift for you…so come up to my Common Room after dinner and I'll give it to you."

"Okay," Harry said easily, with a bit of a furrow in his brow.  _You're going to like it, Harry, I promise you that!  _

Dinner continued uneventfully and at its end, everyone proceeded to their rooms.  Harry followed Hermione to her Common Room after she'd systematically hugged nearly everyone in Gryffindor and Slytherin (in his opinion) and promised to see them off in the morning.

When she had Draco and Harry seated on the couch with drinks, casting glances at one another, she sat on the armchair and began.

"You two need a vacation.  You also need each other.  I've decided to give you both.  I've reserved a resort cottage in the Caribbean for you both.  It's a sweet little one bedroom deal…you'll get sun and fun and hopefully by the end of the two weeks that you're there you'll have decided whether you love or hate each other.  Harry, I've arranged it with Dumbledore so that you have an appropriate cover story…Draco, I leave it up to you to get there.  I've even given you aliases and made sure that this island is wizard-free so that you're not spotted together."  Draco opened his mouth and Hermione held up a hand.  "No, I don't want to hear it.  You're going and that's final."  She reached down into her bag, which was conveniently resting on her lap, as she spoke.  _Ready…steady…now!_  She took a picture as what she'd said registered with them and their mouths dropped open with shock.  _I'll treasure that picture always.  I'll blow it up, even, and paste it on the Headquarter walls!  Ah, the joy of blackmail._

"Are you serious?" Harry asked quietly.

"Of course I'm serious!"  She tossed them two plane tickets and a set of reservations as well as two gift wrapped boxes.

"Open them," she urged.

Before they could rip into the boxes, or even thank her, there was a knock on the door. 

"Enter!" Draco called out.  Ginny, Ron, Blaise, and Milli piled in laughing and arranged themselves on the various pieces of furniture.

"What're those?" Ron asked, gesturing at the boxes.

"These?  Our graduation presents from Hermione," Harry replied. 

"Open them!  'Mione's a great gift-giver!" Ginny urged.  _Oh, they're going to kill me._

Harry ripped his box open at the same time as Draco and they displayed their presents to the room…before turning beet red and stuffing them back in the boxes.

"Cor blimey," Ron muttered, awed.

"They were for your vacation," Hermione offered deadpan.

"Was that a leopard print thong?" Blaise asked.  "It _was_ a leopard print thong.  For a man.  I'm scarred for life."

"Leopard print thong _and _edible body paints," Ginny said with a grin.  "I'll rehabilitate you later, darling." 

Milli was on the floor laughing while Ron stood there, jaw hanging open.  Hermione entertained a moment of delusion wherein she thought she might be fine…right before Draco attacked. 

Ten minutes later, Hermione was screaming for mercy as she gasped on the floor.  Draco paused for a moment, looked up at Harry, and continued tickling her relentlessly.  Ginny took mercy and hauled him off, shooting a glare at Harry to prevent his intervention.  Hermione twitched for a moment before pulling herself off the floor.

"I'm going to miss this, you guys."

"Being tickled mercilessly?" Ron asked sarcastically.

"Yes," Hermione replied flatly.  They started laughing again and Hermione hugged him.  Within moments it was a huge group hug.

They pulled apart and Milli yawned widely.  "I'm going to turn in guys, goodnight."

That was everyone's cue to take their leave and Hermione saw them to the door like a gracious hostess.  _Last time, everyone.__  Smile, nod, make it last.  You'd swear we weren't going to keep in touch.  As though we could avoid it._

Finally, the room was emptied and only Hermione and Draco remained.  Draco stretched and hauled himself off the couch.

"I'm going to bed, Bushy," he yawned.  "Thanks for the gift."  He went upstairs toward his room.  Before entering he stopped for a moment and turned to her.  "By the way, I remember where I've heard that name before.  Severus said it once, when he was a bit sloshed."

"What exactly did he say?" Hermione asked curiously.  _Ooh, fun, a mystery!  I can be Nancy Drew with bushy hair!_

"Ummm….something about it being his mistake for believing it could work for him with someone as good as her?  I think.  Don't really know…I was eavesdropping, you know.  Can't pay great attention when you're worried about getting caught."  _Well, wasn't that helpful?  Even Nancy Drew had better clues than that._

"You were always a little scamp, weren't you?  Off to bed then, I'll clean up, don't worry about it."

"Leave it for the elves.  'Night, Bushy."

"Wouldn't want the elves tossing your edible body paints.  Sleep well, Fairy."

Hermione picked up quickly and went to her room, knowing the next day would pass in a blur.  She grinned slightly as she fell into bed and slipped into a deep slumber.


	5. Chapter 5

Hello all!

My surgery went fine, thanks to all of you who asked after it.  My vision's back, other than a bizarre 'auto-focus' thing my eyes keep doing and an odd halo effect.  I'll be back to my regular posting schedule…still stalled on chapter 14 though.

Hippiechick, Ed, and hand3, you guys are the best.  Your encouragement really gets me going J… hand3, I'm glad you like my characters…sometimes I wonder…

SaraC, thanks for reviewing!  I'm glad you like my work and I hope you enjoy the rest!

--aimes

It was nearly four a.m. when she heard the pounding on her door.

"Hermione!  Open the damned door, right now!"

_Fairy?__  What the hell?  It's four in the bloody morning…if this is a joke, he'll pay._

"Come in, then!" she replied, releasing the wards.  Draco raced into the room fully dressed and grabbed her by the hand.

"Come on, we've got to go to Dumbledore!"

"Calm down!  What's going on, Draco?"  Hermione pulled him onto the bed and forced him to settle for a moment.  He closed his eyes, pulling himself together before he spoke.

"I just spoke with my father.  Tomorrow after everyone's gone, they're going to storm Hogwarts.  The Dark Lord and his followers.  The spies amongst us are to remain here and help them when they come.  My father found out fifteen minutes before I did…apparently Voldemort told no one."

"Wait, if your father found out fifteen minutes before he told you, Snape probably found out then too.  He's quite likely already told Dumbledore, but let's make sure."  She got out of bed and grabbed a handful of floo powder.

"Dumbledore's Office!" she shouted and stepped into the fire.

She stepped out into the illuminated office of Albus Dumbledore.  Fawkes scrutinized her from his perch and she made a face at him.  _Bloody bird thinks he's so damned wise just because he's got an Order named for him.  And his tail's in a couple of really important wands.  Who the hell gives up their damned tailfeathers for wands anyways?  What a crock._

Hermione sat in one of the chairs as Draco stepped out of the fire and walked over to her, dusting himself off.  He sat next to her, looking steely and composed.  Hermione patted his hand reassuringly.

"Hello Hermione, hello Draco," the Headmaster greeted them as he entered his office fully dressed.  "I presume you are here to tell me of the impending invasion of Hogwarts."

"We figured Professor Snape told you, actually," Hermione replied confidently.  "We were unsure, however, whether he realized that the children left here to spy were ordered to stay behind and aid in the invasion."

"I did not, actually," Professor Snape replied from behind her.  _Holy shite!  Bloody git's such a sneak…he needs a damn hobby._

"Surprise," Draco commented ironically.

"As I recall, that's what you said when you told me you were homosexual," replied Snape dryly.  "Not that it was really much of a surprise."

"Touche," Draco granted.

"Back to the issue at hand, gentlemen?"  The group turned to Hermione.  "Hey, it's four in the morning.  Does _anyone_ have the energy for this?"

"You are correct, Miss Granger.  Unfortunately, I do not see any way to stop Voldemort without more in the way of resources."

Snape, Draco, and Dumbledore began tossing out ideas on defence while Hermione sat silently for a moment.  _There's really only one option._

"Give it up," she said aloud.  The men fell silent and looked at her.

"Are you nuts?" Draco voiced everyone's thoughts.

"Probably.  What I mean is that we can't do anything to defend Hogwarts without sacrificing a large quantity of our forces and using weapons that are in the testing phase at best and useless at worst.  We're just not in a position to fight this battle effectively…so our best tactic is to be gone when they get here.  The kids will leave in the morning, we'll drop the wards, and everyone save the mini-spies will Disapparate or portkey out of here.  Headmaster Dumbledore can 'present' the plan at the very last second so that no one will suspect Professor Snape of withholding information.  The spies will corroborate his story that even McGonagall, widely presumed your most trusted advisor, did not know until absolutely the last moment."

There was a moment of silence in the room.

"It's bloody brilliant," Draco murmured.

"I agree," said Snape, sounding a bit surprised.

"The plan seems to be our only option," Dumbledore decided.  "We shall work out the details, Severus.  Thank you, Miss Granger."

"I have my moments," she replied wryly.  "Draco and I need to get back to our quarters in case one of the younger kids comes to him for reassurance."  Dumbledore and Snape nodded distractedly.  Draco gestured to Hermione and she preceded him to the fireplace.

"Goodnight, sirs," she said gently before flooing out.  Draco merely glanced back at them before following her.

In their common room, Draco stared at Hermione pensively. 

"We could die tomorrow, Bushy."

"I know.  Then again, I've done the near-death thing before, remember?  Dying's not what concerns me.  Everyone else dying; that concerns me.  But in response to what you're really asking, I asked Dobby to fetch him a split second before you stepped out of the fire.  I'll be in my room, try not to get too loud about it."  She grinned at him and hugged him tightly.

"Thanks, Hermione."

"Draco, be careful.  When you're about to die, or you've almost died, you tend to make rash decisions.  Don't let that ruin what you've been working toward," she warned.

"I won't," he reassured her.

Hermione turned and went up to her room silently.  As she changed she listened to the sounds of whispering outside and the rustling as clothes came off.  _Is it bad that I'm wondering whether Remus is still here?  Yes.  Stop it, Mya.  You've been through this.  You only have feelings for him because of the trauma he helped you through.  Don't blow it out of proportion.  You want to seek him out right now and have him hold you close; why?  Because he's alive…you want to be near his life, to crawl under his skin and remind yourself that **you're** still alive.  Battle sickness, Mya, that's all it is.  You can't do this, you can't do this. _There was a soft laugh outside and the sound of kissing.  _You don't really want it Hermione.  Okay, you do really want it, but you want it for the wrong reasons and that's not fair to you or him.  Especially if you want something real and lasting.  Oh my gods!  Did you really think that?  _

Hermione cast a silencing charm and screamed in frustration, dropping to her knees and passing her hands over her face.  _You're completely nuts, Mya.  Lie in bed and think of worst case scenarios.  It'll be at least somewhat normal.  _She slumped into bed with a grunt and closed her eyes, counting the moments til morning. 

Counting the moments till her safe haven fell.


	6. Chapter 6

Ed and Hippiechick, thanks again for your reviews!  I'm aiming to get more reviews on this story than on the other two J 

Hippiechick: it was more like I open the chapter 14 file and stare, then close it and decide to do it later…I've actually made it to chapter 15, which will be the last or second to last chapter, so I'm very excited.

Leave me love if it pleases you!

--Aimes

Morning came and brought with it what Hermione had come to think of as 'the end.'  _For the one who proposed the plan, you really have some issues accepting its execution._  She took a deep breath, got out of bed, and got dressed.  _I should look nice for the Deatheaters…right.  Jeans and a tank top again? Yes, indeed._  Hermione slid the switchblade her father had given her long ago into the waistband of her jeans with a smile.  _Go say goodbye to your friends, Mya.  Ugh that sounded so final._ 

Hermione waited for Draco in the common room and they went to the train station together in silence.  When they arrived Hermione plastered a cheery look on her face and ran to her friends, hugging them tightly.

"Take care, you guys!  I'll see you later this summer, alright?" 

"Bye, Mione!" Ron and Ginny called as they hopped onto the train.  Harry gave her a long, intense look then hugged her tightly, almost desperately, once more.

"Please, 'Mione.  Be safe," he whispered.

"Of course I will, you niffler!  Now go or you'll miss the train!"  She kissed him lightly on the lips and shoved him away.  _Do not think about where those lips have been.  Ew, too late. _ She groaned as she wiped her mouth on the back of her hand in a most unladylike fashion.

Draco saw off his Slytherin compatriots, the few who had come to the train station.  If anyone had noticed the rest missing, no one commented.  There were few Slytherins left and the remnants tended to keep to themselves.  _Can't believe Ron hasn't missed Millie yet or Ginny hasn't missed Blaise.  Then again, in this chaos they probably figure they'll find one another on the train._

Hermione waved one last time as the train pulled away from the station.  _Too bad Harry wasn't able to so much as look at Draco without arousing suspicion.  _She turned and looked up at the castle.  _Here we go._

The remaining denizens of the castle proceeded to the Great Hall for the customary end of year meeting.  The meeting had been established taking care of final details, voting on a new Head Boy and Head Girl, and other details of that nature.  As though in slow motion, Hermione proceeded to her seat, smiling at Professor Sprout, nodding at Professor Sinistra.    

Albus Dumbledore cleared his throat.

"Ahem.  On my word, will you all please pick up your glasses for our customary end of year toast," he twinkled.  Several professors looked around in confusion.  There had never been an end of year toast before.  "I hope to make it a long standing tradition," Dumbledore supplied.  Everyone nodded accommodatingly.

Before he could say another word, there was a resounding boom at the door.  An eerie silence descended upon the room as the group watched the entrance with baited breath.  They did not wait long.  Within moments the door blew open.

"Now!" Dumbledore bellowed.  Hermione looked at Draco for a moment then cast her gaze to Snape before moving to grasp her goblet.  Several seats down, she saw Callah close her eyes and begin to disappear as the other Professors portkeyed out of the hall.

Hands hovering in front of her cup, she watched the Deatheaters storm in, waiting. 

_I recognize that swagger. _She blew Dayrin Lestrange a kiss and firmly caught the goblet in her hands as he pulled out his wand.  Hermione felt a pull behind her navel as she disappeared.

_Ow__.  _She landed on her knees in a clearing.  _Not the most kosher position to find oneself in._  Hermione climbed to her feet, dropping the glass and looking around.  _Where is everyone?  _Suspicion sparked through her veins like fire.  Recalling her capture months earlier and her torture at the hands of Bellatrix Lestrange and her nephew Dayrin, Hermione stepped backwards into the shadows and looked around.  Every sense fired, tautly alert, and Hermione pulled out her wand.  _Fuck, what was that?_ A twig snapped and Hermione dropped into a crouch, vaguely noticing that she was getting wet.  _Raining.__  Right.  Why not._

"Hermione?  It's me, Callah.  Where the hell are we?" came the whispered voice.

"I don't know.  How did you end up here?  You never grabbed your cup," she replied sotto voce.

"I teleported, tracking the energy from the portkeys.  I must've latched onto yours."

"Shit, we left a bit after everyone else did, I think.  We were the last ones to disappear.  You must've managed to catch my portkey.  Why didn't you use yours?" Hermione had given up the whispers.

"I hate portkeys, they make me feel squiffy.  So why was yours keyed for someplace other than everyone else's?" Callah asked reasonably.

"Maybe everyone's was keyed for a different place?" Hermione suggested.  "Not a great plan for avoiding panic, but…" she shrugged.

"And why haven't we received further instructions?" Callah asked rhetorically.

"Mmm," Hermione agreed.  Throughout their conversation they'd been exploring the clearing and found it surrounded by a dense forest.  _Not someplace I'd like to get lost in._  "We could be fucking anywhere," Hermione groused.

"Probably still the UK," Callah provided.  "Nowhere else always smells like rain.  Then again, maybe that's because it's raining."

Hermione pondered this a moment before shrugging in mute acquiescence. 

"Oi, we're ninnies!  You know where the bloody Headquarters are, why don't we just Apparate there?"

"Because Albus probably didn't send us there for a reason," Callah said cautiously.

"Ah shite, you're right.  Well we can't wait 'round here forever.  Where d'you want to go?"

Before they could agree on a place, an owl swooped into the clearing and dropped a letter.  It took off without waiting for a response.  Callah and Hermione regarded the letter where it rested on the grassy earth.

"If that's not a letter from Albus, we'll be really really fucked," Callah noted.  _Heh__, she's almost as eloquent as you are, Mya.__  Well done._

Hermione reached out and tentatively grasped the letter.  "Here goes everything," she murmured before ripping it open.

**_Miss Granger,_**

****

**_The Manor._****_  Melke._**

****

**_--Albus Dumbledore_**

"How enlightening," Hermione said sarcastically.  "Presuming that's where the Headquarters are, how the hell are we supposed to get there?  I can't apparate without an idea of a destination."

"I can," Callah said with a shrug.  Hermione looked at her skeptically.  "It's hard to explain.  It's like an internal GPS system.  Oh wait, you're a witch.  A GPS is…"

"I know what a GPS is," Hermione assured her.  "But how does it help us?  I mean you can get there, but I can't." 

"Sure you can.  I'll project," Callah responded confidently.  _Project what?  She seemed so normal yesterday…figures she's nutters._

Hermione stood back expectantly as Callah closed her eyes and concentrated, seeking out the origin of the message.  As soon as she'd caught it, she projected it at Hermione, and suddenly, clear as day, there was an image of a manor in the clearing. 

"That's it," Callah said.  "Can you do it?"

_Let's bloody well hope so.  _"Sure," Hermione lied. 

"On three then.  One, two, go!"  Callah teleported and Hermione disapparated. 

With a crack, Hermione landed at the bottom of the driveway, where Callah had appeared. 

"Ready?"  Hermione murmured.

"Naturally," Callah replied smoothly.  They looked at each other and giggled slightly hysterically.  _You've just abandoned your one safe haven and appeared in front of a manor that looks like it belonged to Dr. Frankenstein.  Life just keeps getting better._

Hermione grabbed Callah's hand and proceeded up to the manor with an air of braveness she did not feel.  When they reached the door, she chickened out.

"You knock," she hissed.

"Why me?" Callah shot back.

"You're older!"

"Thanks, rub it in."

There was a pause.  "Rock, paper, scissors?" Hermione suggested.  Callah looked at her as though she were in kindergarten before relenting.

"One, two, three!"  Callah picked scissors, Hermione picked rock.

"Best two out of three?" Callah hedged hopefully. 

"No chance, knock!"

Callah stuck her tongue out and raised her hand, delivering a strong, confident knock.  The door swung open on well oiled hinges.  Hermione looked at Callah nervously and entered the house.  They'd taken only two steps in when the door slammed shut behind them and something grabbed their shoulders.

Hermione and Callah yelped simultaneously and whirled so fast they had to grab each other for balance.  Hermione's wand was out instantly and Callah's eyes were sparking with some sort of electricity.

Remus Lupin laughed.  "You should see the looks on your faces!"  He chortled, trying unsuccessfully to catch his breath.  _He thinks it's funny, does he?  _

Hermione attacked, pinning him while Callah tickled ruthlessly.  "Let me go!  Not fair, you outnumber me.  Besides, they're waiting for you!"  Callah didn't pause and Hermione merely smiled triumphantly from her position straddling his chest.  She leaned down till she was staring into his eyes from barely an inch away and said sweetly, "Shouldn't mess with two chicks who outclass you in every way, Remus.  Bad practice," she whispered in his ear.

He let out a deep guttural growl and Hermione froze.  _Stop. Control yourself, what the fuck are you thinking, Mya.  Okay, you're thinking about fucking him, that's not the point.  Wow, didn't realize so much blood could rush south so fast._

"Miss Granger, why are you sitting upon Remus?  And Miss Riese, is there a reason you're tickling him?"

Hermione's chaotic whirl of thoughts froze and her eyes widened.  _Oops._  Remus winced.

Hermione clambered to her feet and pulled Remus up.  "Sorry, sir.  This fu—niffler decided to scare the wits out of Callah and I, so we retaliated."

"Probably not the most effective way to deal with the Dark Lord should you encounter him, Miss Granger," came McGonagall's crisp brogue.

"Yeah, he slapped me when I sassed him," Hermione noted absently.  McGonagall registered her faux pas too late and attempted to apologize.

"I'm sorry, Miss Granger.  I'd almost forgotten—"

"No need," Hermione interrupted with surprise.  "It's not a big deal.  Anyways, there are people waiting for us, aren't there?  We should go."

Dumbledore led the way to the parlour, where Hermione took stock of the inhabitants of the room before sitting on an armchair and waiting for the meeting to commence.


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you Ed, Hippiechick, hand3 and Lil.  Reviews never fail to make me happy!  SaraC, glad to see you're still reading.  I read a few of your stories (told you I click on reviewers' profiles) and I liked them a lot.  Give me a few days and you'll get real reviews on them ;)

Here's a question for everyone: should I get anymore in depth with Callah or leave her as she is?  Not the most multifaceted character but this story was never about her, so I'm a bit conflicted as to whether I want to pull in any of her issues beyond Snape.  Decisions, decisions…

Enjoy this next chapter, which is lovingly dedicated to my computer.  I went back into my old files and realized how grateful I am that some things will forever remain between me and him alone! 

--Aimes

Albus Dumbledore entered and stood near the hearth.  On the sofa sat Professors Sprout, Sinistra, and Grubbly-Plank.  Professor Flitwick perched on the arm of the couch, next to Sprout, sipping a cup of tea.  McGonagall sat in an armchair primly, legs crossed at the ankles, spine ramrod straight.  Adjacent to her in the armchair's match, Remus relaxed comfortably.  Callah sat in front of Hermione on the floor, facing the hearth from across the coffee table, while Snape leaned against the doorframe behind them.  Hermione curled her legs beneath her and waited for Albus to begin. 

He simply waited.  _Maybe he's communicating telepathically with everyone but me.  _Hagrid, Molly, Arthur and Bill Weasley, and Tonks burst into the room.  Tonks knocked over a vase and everyone sighed.  _Or maybe he was waiting for people.  Way to be a smart kid, Mya.  Such rational thoughts you have._  Hagrid straggled in moments later.

"Well, my dear friends, it seems we have reached a critical point in this war.  Hogwarts has been sacrificed.  Not for long however, no, no.  We shall begin planning an offensive immediately.  Callah and Miss Granger shall be in charge of it.  Callah has the wisdom of experience and Miss Granger has recently shown an aptitude for this sort of work.  You two shall remain here along with Remus.  This will be our meeting point.  The rest of us will split up and continue on our separate projects.  Hagrid, Tonks, Arthur, we shall rally the troops.  Molly, please contact the other magical creatures who have agreed to assist us.

"Within the hour, I expect a report from the Aurors from you, Kingsley, a report from the giants from Hagrid, and a ministry update, Arthur.  We shall all return here to receive the reports.  Remus, Severus, please come with me, we have something to discuss.  Thank you."  Albus left swiftly and everyone snapped into action.  _Me?  Plan an offensive?  Is he mad?  Of course he's mad, he's Dumbledore.  This is fucking fantastic.  'Here you go, Hermione, the lives of our ragtag army and the morale of our cause rest on you.  Good luck, kiddo.'  …The magical world is officially screwed._

Callah stood and pulled Hermione to her feet.  "We're going to need my laptop.  A tactical incursion of this scale's gonna need simulations."  _Then again, maybe we'll make it._

"Have you done this before?" Hermione asked nervously.

"Sure.  I'm a spy, remember?  I've never planned anything on this scale, but I've been trained to do it if I need to…we'll be fine," she assured Hermione.  "Think of it as a mental exercise…a strategic thing.  Try not to remember that they're real people, it'll make it easier."

"Um, Ron's better at this sort of thing, you know.  Chess and all.  Maybe he should be doing this?"  Hermione clawed for a way out.

"We don't need a strategist, hon, that's why I'm here.  What we need is someone versed in all the possibilities: knowledgeable enough to tell me what kind of magic they'll use, curses and all, and creative enough to predict possible new weapons they've come up with.  Now stop stalling and let's go."

"I'm not stalling…I'm just…stalling.  Okay, yeah.  Right.  Let's go then," Hermione said miserably.

"Cheer up, hon.  You'll be fine.  I've done this before, and we'll get Severus to help.  I think between the three of us we can get it together."

_Or we'll cause the deaths of most of the wizarding world.  Shit, shit, shit.  Now would be a good time to take up smoking.  Or drinking.  Or both.  Yeah, both._

For the rest of the afternoon, Callah and Hermione sat in the kitchen and took stock of their resources, stopping only to take notes on the reports from Arthur Weasley, Hagrid, and Tonks.  Using what they had learned, the women began to let a plan take shape.

Several hours later, they were exhausted.  Hermione slumped against the kitchen table as Callah growled.

"We've got shit.  Have you noticed that?"

"Our best bet is to get in as quietly as possible and take them on in a straight out confrontation.  We need to use all our forces, so quietly eliminating till we get to Voldemort is out, right?  But we can't launch a large scale offensive or we'll lose a lot of people."

"That about covers it.  Which leaves us with the problem of making sure they're all together in roughly the same place at the same time.  I think Severus can help with that.  That only leaves us with how we're going to get in."

"Dunno," Hermione admitted.  "Knock?"  _Brilliant idea, Mya.__  You're an idiot._

Callah was quiet for a moment.

"D'you know?  That just might work."

_  What might work? She's got to be kidding. _

"What might work?"

"Knocking.  If the giants express interest in joining with Voldemort…we can just knock.  That's our in."

"That's insane," Hermione protested.

"This entire war is insane," Callah countered.  "Abandoning Hogwarts was insane, not hunting down that son of a bitch and exorcising him or whatever was insane, having two people instead of an entire team plan the incursion is insane; sanity is not something we're endowed with much of.  Might as well stick with the trend."

Hermione pondered it.  _She's got a point, you know._

"It's late, Callah.  We should sleep on it and talk to Professor Snape tomorrow.  It'll still take us weeks to work out the details."

Callah sighed.  "You're probably right.  I'm beat."  She stood and shut down her laptop.  "Goodnight, 'Mione."

"Goodnight, Callah.  I'm going to have some hot chocolate before I turn in.  Sleep well."  Callah smiled and proceeded upstairs, yawning.

Hermione poured herself a glass of Chenin Blanc (apparently known in some circles as hot chocolate) and went outside.  The night was calm and balmy and she sat on the patio in the courtyard staring out into nothingness.  _So he's alive.  Of course I expected him to be, but still.  He doesn't frighten me, no more than he ever did.  Why did you stay to see him, Mya?  What possessed you? You'll get your chance with him…_

_Dayrin__ Lestrange…_

"Penny for your thoughts?" came the gentle voice, startling Hermione out of her reverie.

"They're not worth that much," she replied lightly, trying to banish the heaviness of her heart.

"Then share them for free," Remus challenged.  He sat next to her, setting his own glass of wine next to hers.  He hesitated a moment, then touched her hand gently.  Hermione slipped her fingers into his, intertwining them, not looking at him.  The patio ended into a large grassy lawn which in turn ended at the edge of the cliff, looking out over the sea.  Hermione and Remus sat like this for a moment: hands entwined, quiet, contemplative.

_What are you doing, Mya?  Idiot alert, danger, danger!  Release him right this instant and go inside.  Go to sleep.  Take a cold shower.  Shoot yourself._

Hermione ignored her inner voice and instead rested her head on his shoulder.

"I saw him," she said softly.

"I know.  You were the last to arrive…why?" he asked gently.

"I don't know.  I just had to.  I don't know," she repeated.

His thumb began stroking the back of her hand, sending shivers down her spine.  "I understand," he whispered.

"Really?  Feel free to explain it to me, then," she replied wryly.

"You had to see him in a situation where you were equals, where you were as strong as he," he explained simply.

"As in he's not beating me.  Yeah, I suppose you're right, actually," she admitted.  "Remus, I…"  _Shut up!  Don't say it!  SHUT UP!!!_

"Yes?" he asked, trying to hide the note of wistfulness.

"I need to go to sleep," she rushed, stumbling over her words.  Hermione stood abruptly and prepared to leave.  Something stopped her even as her mind screamed for her to get out of the situation.  Hermione turned to him and smiled.

"Thank you," she murmured, her voice soft and sweet. "You've always understood." She leaned down and kissed him feather light on the lips.  Remus felt his body react, urging him to deepen the kiss.

She was gone before he opened his eyes. 

Remus sighed and let himself fall backwards onto the patio.  "What the hell is wrong with me?" he asked the night.

Hermione lay in bed, mentally running in circles.  _You're an idiot.  Why did you do that?  Why do you want to do that again?  Because he's gorgeous.  Because sparks run through you when he touches you.  Hell, sparks run through you when he LOOKS at you!  You're fucking screwed._

 "Just shag him already, and call it a day, sweetheart.  When you two look at each other the room heats about fifteen degrees," Callah called sleepily from the other bed.

"Sorry," Hermione said sheepishly.  _Go to bed; try not to think about it.  If he wants to deal with it you can discuss this with him later.  As you snog him senseless._

_Oh gods._


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, here we go!  (Settle in, this A/N is a doozy.)

Hippiechick was the first reviewer on my last chapter.  You keep late nights, chickie, I posted that guy as I was about to fall over!  I only posted it because I felt guilty about waiting so long, and your instant review made me glad I did.  Lily, hand3, SaraC and Ed also reviewed like clockwork, making me incredibly happy as usual!! 

And I had two reviews from new people (whose profiles I immediately explored).  Joots, glad to meet you (sort of) and I'm really glad you like my stuff.

Deus-ex-Maria: Your review made me unreasonably happy.  Talk about an ego boost.  I'm glad you didn't notice too many errors—I don't have a beta, so they're all my mistakes if there are any.  (And no one has noticed that in Potholes I blatantly contradict myself on a small detail.  I keep forgetting to go back and change that but then again, I'm apparently the only one who noticed.) 

Right, so there are two versions of this chapter, actually, and I eventually flipped a coin to decide which one to post.  I only had two people give me feedback on whether I should get more into Callah or not.  Hippiechick and Joots: thank you.  Unfortunately, they voted opposite ways so it still ended up being my call. 

I've decided to get into Callah just a teeny bit beyond her relationship to Snape and only because it puts Hermione in an interesting position—she likes Callah, but is that enough for her to overlook Callah's flaws?  Callah wasn't too happy with my decision since in the original work she was created for, she's a bad guy and she's having way too much fun being a good guy but if I give her an inch…  I also thought it would give me room to work and considering I only barely go outside what I've already discussed about her in other stories…well enough of that.  This is the chapter you guys get.

Sorry, Joots, hope it doesn't put you off the story.  It's really only this chapter, I promise. 

--Aimes of the Really Long Author's Notes for an Already Ridiculously Long Chapter

One Month Later:

This morning, as with every morning for the last month, Hermione woke up around nine.  Not late, to be sure, but Callah was one of those sick people who rose at the crack of dawn, making Hermione feel perpetually lazy.  Of course, Callah slept a hell of a lot earlier than Hermione, but still—getting up that early was not natural in Hermione's view.  _Typical morning in the surreality that has become my life.__  Is surreality a word?  It is in the Dictionary According to Me.  _Hermione rolled out of bed and dragged herself to the bathroom.  When she was finished, she pulled on jeans and a t-shirt and tugged her riotous hair back into a ponytail.  _Breakfast…fooood….man, you're a pig, Mya.  _She headed straight for the kitchen, walking noiselessly, and stopped short at the door, watching curiously.

Callah sat at the table with a glass of orange juice, facing the window.  Perpendicular to her sat Snape, holding a cup of coffee.  They were both silently staring out the window.  Not a bizarre scene, but there was something ever so slightly…off about it.

_Wait, there it is.  She handed him the sugar without him saying anything.  And there again!  He got up and gave her a bagel from the toaster.  Are they communicating telepathically?  No… Why is telepathy always my first assumption?   It looks as though…well, it looks as though they've done this before.  About a million times.  _Hermione raised an eyebrow.  Callah took the bagel without comment, head turning towards him and her eyes flitting up towards him and her mouth beginning to quirk in a smile that was never realized.  The smile vanished without being fully formed and Hermione suspected that the spark in her eyes faded ever so slightly.  She wondered if Callah noticed the disappointed look that passed through Snape's eyes for just a microsecond. _ Almost positively not._

Hermione cleared her throat as she entered.  "Morning," she said mildly.

"Morning, 'Mione.  Sleep well, lazybones?" Callah teased.

"Very well, thank you," Hermione replied in as dignified a tone as she could manage.  "I'm proud to count myself amongst the normal people who do not rise at the first hint of sunlight."  Snape merely looked up at her and nodded once.  "Good morning to you too, Sunshine," Hermione muttered under her breath.

Snape had moved to the counter and was graciously putting an English muffin in the toaster for Hermione.  He stopped his activity at her comment and shot her a nonplussed look.

"Sorry," Hermione apologized sheepishly, ducking her head and pouring a cup of coffee.  Snape nodded silently and began to put grape jelly on her muffin.  _He always uses just the right amount of spread…well, he did make them for me for three weeks or so, and he's been making them for me off and on since.  _She smiled at him as he set the plate at the table and sat down again and impulsively leaned over to kiss him on the cheek.  "Thank you."

"Control yourself," came the snarky response.  Callah laughed and Hermione grinned.

"Well, nice to know some things will never change," Hermione noted.  "So what are we doing today?"

"The same thing we do every day, Pinky.  Trying to take over the world!" Callah joked.  Snape looked at her as though she was crazy.  "Pinky and the Brain?  No?  Muggle thing, I guess."  Hermione chortled into her coffee cup.

"Narf!"  Snape now shot odd looks at both of them as they laughed hysterically. 

"If you're quite finished," he prodded.

"Sorry, sir," Hermione apologized, gasping for breath.  "But really, what is the plan for today?  We don't often see you around here."  _Not strictly true.  You've been seeing him much more frequently since Voldemort and Lucius visited you two weeks ago in the cottage you and Callah were using and you had to come back to the Manor._

"We are working on the incursion to take back Hogwarts, as usual.  That will be our task until the plan is complete.  You have pored over enough books about the dark arts to be ready for just about anything, the plan must take shape.  I cannot be here all the time as my duties require my return to Hogwarts, however I shall return as frequently as possible to help in the coming days." 

Callah's expression was veiled as she spoke: "Don't risk yourself, Severus."  _Something's afoot.  He's accelerating our schedule, meaning there's big stuff getting ready to go down._

"What is one more risky move in a worthless life already poised to crumble?" he sneered.

"If you fall, we all go down with you," Callah warned.  "So keep walking the tightrope.  We need you."

_He looks almost…hurt?  Nah…well, maybe._

"What's happening?" Hermione asked quietly, to change the subject.

"Voldemort's getting closer to moving openly in the wizarding world," Callah supplied.  "We're stepping up the pace."

"I see," Hermione said softly.  "Let's get to it then."  Snape nodded and Callah pulled out her laptop.  The work continued.

Later that Evening:

"Goodnight Severus," Hermione said distractedly as she finished planning where the centaurs, a surprise group of allies, would position their forces.  She hummed along to the cd playing absently as she worked, but the activity at the door did not escape her.  "In my nightmares I feel so alive; in my dreamscape escapades I make the grade, I save the day…" she sang along, trying to look as oblivious as possible.

Callah stood and stretched, walking Snape to the door.  "Take care, Severus," she said sincerely as he opened the door.  He paused for just a moment with his back to her before leaving without a response.  Callah sighed slightly as she closed the door behind him.

_Okay, enough of this bullshit.  She's going to tell me what's going on or I'm going to strangle her._

Hermione stood abruptly and set about making herself some hot chocolate.  "We need a break," she said to Callah's curious look.  "Let's go to the living room and chill out for a minute."  Callah shrugged, smiling, and Hermione poured a second cup of hot chocolate, handing it to Callah as she moved toward the living room.  She took a seat on the sofa, curling her legs beneath her, and Callah sat opposite her, watching the fire.  Callah pulled at her tank top.

"You know, I never used to wear sleeveless shirts till I met you," she noted.  Silence reigned again for a few moments.

"Angel's food or Devil's food?"  Hermione challenged.

"Angel's food.  Missionary or on top?"  Callah upped the ante.

"Whatever's most convenient," Hermione hedged.

"Oh no!  Not acceptable!  Pick one!"  The argument began with no signs of abating in the near future. 

An hour later there was a lull after Hermione snorted, "Yeah, well, as long as it's more than two minutes, who really cares?" 

As Callah pondered this, Hermione pounced.  "So, what 's the history with you and Hogwarts?  You were never a student there."

""No…wow, it's been, what?  Ten years?  When I was fourteen, Albus found out about me from a mutual contact in the muggle world.  I'd already been doing espionage work for years…just about as soon as my abilities had been identified, I started training to be a spy.  Anyways, he set up a meeting where he offered to teach me and help me develop my gifts.  I told him I couldn't give up seven years for school, so we compromised: one summer and we'd see where it went.  I figured, why not?  At the least, I'd become better at my job, right?  I worked with all of the teachers the summer that I turned sixteen, and developed my powers considerably.  Snape was the same as always…he and I argued a lot.  I wasn't buying any bullshit about his authority and he wasn't buying any bullshit about me being 'special.'  Remus Lupin was hanging around at the time, doing some cleanup work and recon.  You must have been…ten.  Two years or so shy of going to Hogwarts.  Anyways, I got to know all of the teachers and Remus, and developed pretty close relationships with everyone."

"Even Snape?" Hermione teased.   _Hah, dodge that, spy girl!_

"Ah.  Severus.  He and I were…different.  He was in his late twenties or early thirties at the time, but same old Snape.  I told you we conflicted.  A lot.  Eventually though, we started gaining a grudging respect for each other, I would say.  He tolerated me and I pissed him off as frequently as possible.   One day, when I was seventeen, it came to a head.  I blame Albus.  To this day I'm sure he sparked the argument between us, something about me shifting molecules in potions…effects and whatnot.   We ended up in the dungeons screaming at each other, and I snapped and left.  I went to muggle London to calm down, where I promptly managed to get shot by an old...friend." 

"Do your friends frequently try to kill you?"

"You'd be amazed.  Anyways, Severus had come after me in a momentary flash of guilt…and fear that Albus would slaughter him.  He found me bleeding on the ground and he freaked out.  He got me back to Pomfrey and spent every moment with me.  Even slept on a chair next to me.  I'm sure you can see where this is headed.  We were, naturally, completely in love with each other, despite all rational evidence pushing for the contrary.  It was the hardest thing in the world for me.  The thing you've got to understand about me…I don't feel."

Hermione looked at her as though she were crazy.  Callah shrugged and tried to elucidate.  "I don't know if I was always this way or if I had emotion trained out of me but I don't feel.  I kill without remorse and for me, that's fine.  I don't know any other state of being.  Severus _feels._  That's why he hates himself so much: he has kept a mental count of everyone he's ever hurt or killed.  It's also why he hated me, at first.  He hated that I slept every night without guilt."

Hermione hesitated.  "That's a little…disturbing.  I mean, no one's perfect, but I kinda had you pegged as a perpetual cool girl whose worst crime was snoring and not being able to hold her liquor."

"Well, both of those things are true, but…the most perfect packages hide the most horrible secrets, you know.  I understand if the idea puts you off me.  The word for people like me is 'sociopath.'  No conscience."

"But you…seem like a good person," Hermione struggled.

"I am what I was trained to be and what I choose to be.  Had it been terrorists that had taken me in and raised me, I'd have given Carlos the Jackal a run for his money.  As it is, I'll admit to having done assassin work on the side.  I set moral boundaries for myself out of respect for my deceased parents…or at least that's what I tell myself.  In truth, who knows why I do what I do?  I choose to be what is accepted as a 'good person.'"

"Gods.  If Voldemort had gotten to you first…"

"I'd be plotting your death as we speak.  Frightening, I know, but it's one of those things you either learn to deal with or use as a reason to never speak to me again.  I like you Hermione, I really do, more than I've ever liked anyone, really, but don't fool yourself: I could kill you if the incentive was right.  You're the closest thing I've ever had to a friend but I doubt I'd flinch as I pulled the trigger."

"Well…thanks for being honest?"  _About being totally fine with murdering me!_

"No point in dancing around it, really.  In any case, falling in love was chaos for me because of the _emotion_.  It was almost painful.  After that argument, though, I stopped fighting it.  It was the scariest thing I've ever done.

"Everything was fine until my eighteenth birthday.  No, scratch that, everything was blissfully perfect, which automatically worried me.  He ended up being all I'd ever wanted in life.  On my eighteenth birthday, however, I found out that a terrorist group I'd crossed paths with in the past had learned that I had a sister.  They kidnapped her, and I got angry.  I left immediately, but I got there too late.  She was in so much pain when I found her she was begging to die."

"You killed her?" Hermione breathed.  _Would you have killed her, Mya?  If she was dying and in that much pain?  _

"She couldn't have been saved; I could tell from looking at her.  I killed everyone.  It was remarkably bloody, even for me.  By the time the anger abated, I was…empty.  All I really wanted was to go home to the man I loved.  But it had been almost four months since I'd left and I hadn't said a word to anyone except Albus.  And him I swore to secrecy…I think, sometimes, that I sabotaged my own relationship because the _goodness_ of it all was so nerve-wracking for me.  Then I realize that I would have given anything to be with him, so it's more likely I was just incredibly stupid.

"I went back to Hogwarts shortly before the school term began and tried to find Severus, but…it all went to hell.  One of the singular worst moments of my life.  The problem with feeling things like love is that it opens you up to a whole new world of pain.  I left again and didn't go back.  I never stopped regretting what an idiot I had been, not telling him.  It still aches when I see him, but now we just pretend it never happened.  Only Remus really knows the whole story.  I went to him and he provided me with a listening ear and a bottle of tequila.  In retrospect I think that contributed to the extreme hate Severus used to bear Remus, but it wasn't something I considered at the time." 

Callah and Hermione lapsed into another silence.

"Wow," Hermione finally said.  _Really wow.  I've really got to think about this…_

"Yeah, wow," Callah replied wryly. 

"We should start a club.  Chicks Who Choose Chumps." 

Callah started laughing and within moments, both of them were collapsed, laughing so hard they could barely speak.

"No, I can't even blame him.  Well, I can blame him for not hearing me out when I tried to tell him what had happened.  He pretty much threw me out before I said a word.  Didn't even manage a 'sorry' before my butt hit the ground outside his door.  So maybe it is kinda his fault," she mused.  "But Remus isn't a chump.  He's an amazing guy…so you can't be in the club."

"Oh shut up," Hermione grumped.  "I suppose I'm the chump, but still.  Maybe we just need to rename it Chicks Who Choose the Wrong Guys…"

"Nah, not as catchy," Callah countered.

"Ooh, good point," Hermione conceded.  Silence again.  _Well hell, Snape and Callah.  And why not, Mya?  Is he not allowed to have a love life?  Of course he is, just not a sex life.  _Hermione shivered.  _Don't go there.  _She glanced over at Callah.  _Okay, you went there, now COME BACK.  Although…she IS really flexible…_

"Oh my god, I really didn't want to think about that!"  Hermione yelped.  Callah looked over at her bizarrely then cracked up, laughing so hard she started crying. 

"You…us…" she gasped.  And then, just to rub it in:  "Handcuffs?"  And more laughter.

Hermione cringed, as the new thought flitted through her psyche.  _Handcuffs?__  Oh lord, handcuffs.  Well, his bed at his Manor did have places where you could—bloody hell, STOP!!!_

Hermione stood quickly and fled for the kitchen, with Callah still collapsed on the sofa laughing.  _Wash cup, think of not gross thoughts.  Butterflies, birds…bees?  Ack, no!  Sanity, Mya, sanity!  _Hermione washed the mug vigorously.

"You know, the cup's not getting any cleaner," came a voice from behind her.  She dropped it instantly and it shattered in the sink.

"Shit!"  Hermione cursed.

"Hermione, calm down," Remus ordered soothingly, placing his hands on her shoulders.  "What's wrong?"  Hermione took deep breaths and leaned back against him.

"Sorry," she apologized, embarrassed. 

"She was in a scary mental place," called Callah from the doorway.  "Told her about me and Severus."  Hermione felt Remus shudder slightly.  _At least I'm not the only one!_

"I'm fine," Hermione assured them.  "Deeply creeped out, but fine nonetheless."

"Sorry, darling, I know it's kind of like finding out your parents have sex," Callah said mildly.

"Don't want to hear that!" Hermione said loudly.  Callah laughed again.

"Okay, okay, I'm going to bed before I do too much more damage."  She snickered as she went upstairs.

"Ugh, handcuffs," Hermione muttered.

"Okay, _I_ didn't need to hear that," Remus protested. 

"Just sharing the pain," Hermione said sweetly.  She finished cleaning up the cup and tossed it in the bin before walking over to the cupboard and pulling out two wine glasses.  She poured him one silently and handed it to him, taking his proffered arm as they strolled outside.  They sat at the edge of the patio as they had every night since she'd returned to the Manor.  At the cottage, they'd sat on the lawn.  Hermione said nothing when his arm snaked around her waist as it tended to, and Remus remained silent as she rested her head on his shoulder, only smiling faintly at the lingering citrus smell of her hair.

"How was your mission?" Hermione asked quietly.

"Successful," he responded.  "Which is more than enough for me.  How goes the work with Callah and Severus?"

"Not bad.  It's developed…I'd say we're about halfway done.  And when it's finished…" she shrugged.

"When it's finished we take back what's ours," Remus said firmly. 

"Sure," Hermione sighed. 

"Hey, are you okay?" Remus rubbed her shoulders gently.

"It's just…Our projected casualties just hit three hundred.  That's a lot Remus.  We've minimized it as much as humanly possible, but three hundred.  And that's a lowball estimate.  I'm sending a lot of people to their deaths."

"No, Hermione, you're saving a lot of people from a fate worse than death," he retorted.  "Trust me, I've seen it.  I'd rather die than live in a world where he ruled."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Hermione muttered almost inaudibly.  Remus stiffened in confusion.  "I'm tired, Remus, I'm going to call it a night."

"Let me walk you to your room," he offered, rising and holding out his hand.  He sent the dishes to the kitchen with a quick gesture and took her hand gently, leading her towards the house.

"My little girl, drive anywhere, do what you want, I don't care," Hermione sang under her breath, twining her fingers tightly with his.  _Now where did **that** song come from?_

"Tonight, I'm in the hands of fate, I hand myself over on a plate, now," Remus picked up.  _And how does he know it?  _They walked inside, taking turns singing the song softly.  __

"Oh little girl, there are times when I feel, I would rather not be the one behind the wheel, come.  Pull my strings, watch me move, I do anything, please.  Sweet little girl, I prefer, you behind the wheel, and me the passenger, drive.  I'm yours to keep, do what you want, I'm going cheap, tonight."

They reached Hermione and Callah's room and she turned to kiss him on the cheek.

"You're behind the wheel," he sang into her ear, nuzzling her almost imperceptibly before pulling away.  _Don't I know it._

"Goodnight Hermione."

"Goodnight Remus," she went into her room and abandoned herself to sleep.  _I'm behind the wheel.  I hate driving._

A/N: The first song is Nightmare by Eve6 from the Horrorscope album.  The second is Behind the Wheel by Depeche Mode, available on their Singles 86-98 album.


	9. Chapter 9

Ed, thanks for the review (you were first on that last chapter)! Joots, glad you're still around, that's about as far into Callah as we'll get, so no worries… Hippiechick, I'm relieved that you liked the twist since you were the primary reason it made it into the cut.

Hand3, thank you for your review as well, and thanks for reminding me—I was meaning to insert some stuff into another chapter about the casualties and totally forgot. Don't worry, they're mostly nameless people since I can't think of 300 characters off the top of my head without making a complete Armageddon out of it. A few of the more familiar people who get knocked off are mentioned both in this story and 'Normal.'

Welcome Neko-P, a very big hello to you! Your review made me blush; glad I've made an addict out of you! Is the effect like caffeine or weed? Or really good wine? Am I making you into a story alcoholic? Okay, I'll stop now, I make no sense at all.

In other news, I've made it to chapter 16, where I'm diligently avoiding the boudoir scene…they're hard to write! I'm pretty sure this thing will be finished at 17 chapters, so we're almost done, kiddies!

Here's another question for everyone: I've got a pretty much complete story that's HG/SS. However I feel like there's already a huge body of work in that department with authors much more talented than myself (coughHayseedcough). I _could_ shift it to be Remus/Hermione or I could post it as is or I could leave it between me and my computer. Any votes?

And has anyone noticed that the author's notes just keep growing?

--Aimes

ps--you know what's really sad? I just discovered the quick edit function on ff. on my third posted story. how lame am i?

* * *

Another Month Later:

"So that's it then?" asked Hermione, exhausted.

"Seems like," Callah said, seeming surprised. "Didn't actually think we'd ever finish."

"Indeed," rumbled Snape. Callah glanced at him and looked back at her computer quickly. The look did not go unnoticed by Hermione. Nor did Snape's penetrating gaze as it lingered on Callah.

"A week, then," Hermione said flatly.

"Yeah," Callah managed wearily. "Look, I'm beat. Can you guys finish up on your own?"

"Yeah, we're cool," Hermione said easily. "Get some sleep, hon." Callah and Hermione had bonded to the point of sisterhood, once Hermione had dealt with her initial trepidation. Over the course of two months, Hermione, Callah, and Snape had planned the offensive. It was finally close to finished, a multi-tiered incursion using all of the allies of the Order of the Phoenix, and none too soon. Voldemort was getting ever stronger, drawing closer to an overt takeover of the magical world. Hermione, Callah, and Severus had stepped up the pace.

And now? They were finished. It was three in the morning. Hermione looked at Severus and sighed.

"We'll present it in the morning. I must return to Hogwarts." Snape turned to leave. Hermione grabbed his wrist.

"Please be careful, Severus. I can't lose you," she said desperately. _Where did THAT come from? _He looked down at her, calm, quiet…then something sparked in his eyes.

"You won't lose me, Hermione. You're stressed out, on edge. The plan is dangerous, we all know that. Callah is losing herself in sleep; you may not realize it but it is an escape tactic. You needn't worry, I shall be fine." Hermione stood and hugged him tightly. He embraced her in return, before mumbling soothingly in her ear, "It will work, Miss Granger."

"Yes," she replied faintly, releasing him. "Severus, about Callah…" She'd been waiting quite awhile to ask him about it. _You've turned into such a nosy little thing, Hermione Granger. Oh wait, you always have been, haven't you? _

"You eventually accept that she is what she is, Hermione. Does her lack of guilt somehow make her more responsible than the rest of us? I don't know and it is surely not for me to decide. She is good to you and that is all that truly matters."

"Thank you…now go," she ordered with a wan smile. "Ignore my insanity. Good luck." He nodded and exited swiftly.

Hermione poured herself a glass of wine and walked outside as she'd been doing every night for two months. Tonight, again, Remus joined her. He'd made a habit of it when he was not away doing work for the Order.

"It's finished," she said, not looking at him. _You never look at him. What are you afraid of seeing, Mya? Are you afraid of how he might look back at you? Are you afraid he might care? Yes, but I'm much more scared that he might not. Go, go Gryffindor! You've got about as much courage as the Cowardly Lion._

"How does it feel?"

"Terrifying. We're about to put everything on the line…lives will be lost, blood will be on my hands. I…shouldn't say it." Hermione settled into his embrace, his arms around her, her head on his shoulder.

"Shouldn't say what? Blood will not be on your hands, Hermione. You've done all you can. The rest is out of your control."

"I know," Hermione said softly. They sat in a silent embrace for several moments. "Walk me to my room?" She stood up and offered him her hand.

"Always," he murmured in response, rising. Remus' arm settled about her waist and she relaxed against him. They walked in silence into the house. When they reached the hallway, Hermione turned sharply, away from her room, into his.

"Hermione, what are you—" he was silenced by her lips on his. Hermione's rational thought centers shut down. _As though they ever functioned._ She gave herself over to the kiss, allowing her body to engage in it. Her arms snaked around his neck, pulling him down to her and his hands slid down to her bum, shifting to knead the pliant flesh of her hips. Hermione groaned against him, lifting a leg and hooking it round his hips. One of his hands shifted to support her. Remus emitted a low growl and sucked on her lower lip, begging for permission to enter her mouth. Hermione gasped as he nibbled lightly and he took the opportunity to slip his tongue into the warm, wet heat of her mouth. Hermione kneaded his shoulders desperately and tangled her fingers into his hair. _How did I end up against a wall? …Why do I care?_ Suddenly, Remus stopped.

"Wha--?" Hermione moaned.

"Hermione, we've got to stop," he whispered. "This is wrong. You should go back to your room…and…"

"And we should never speak of this again?" she challenged. "Why? I want it, you want it, where's the trouble?"

"I was best friends with your best friend's parents, for one."

"Age is hardly an issue here, Remus." _Why are we having this conversation backed up against a wall with my legs wrapped around him? Hell, why are we having this damn conversation at all?_

"No," he growled suddenly, "it's not. Do you want to know why we shouldn't be doing this, Hermione? Because I won't be able to stop. I'll tear off your clothes and…I don't want to hurt you," he pleaded, desperate. "But I…if I spend another moment here with you, I'll lose what little control I had in the first place. I don't want it, not like this." He released her and she slid to the ground, looking down. _I really don't want to have to look him in the eye. This is such an embarrassing moment. I should win an award if I survive it._

He cupped her chin and forced her gaze to him. _Naturally.__ Why do they always do that?_

"Not like this," he whispered, kissing her gently.

"No," she agreed calmly. "Goodnight, Remus." She walked away with her head held high and her nerves in her stomach. _I will not run, I will not run._

"Did you shag him?" came the sleepy inquiry, as it did every night.

"No, go back to sleep," Hermione replied crossly. Callah was instantly awake.

"What happened?"

"I threw myself at him and he rejected me. I'm a fucking idiot. Why oh why do I do this to myself?"

"This has happened more than once?"

"Well, no. Good point. Where's the commiserating sympathy?"

"Hey, I haven't even done it once. I've done far, far stupider things. What do you mean he rejected you?"

"There are stupider things? I mean he rejected me. I mean, we kissed, we were getting kind of…intense, and suddenly he stops."

"Just like that?"

"Yeah. Says something about the age difference. I told him that age was hardly an issue…"

"And?"

"And he told me that the real reason is that he wouldn't be able to stop. I mean, that's the point, isn't it? If I'd wanted to stop, I wouldn't have started to begin with!"

"I see your point. Did he say anything else?"

"Umm, yeah," Hermione blushed. "He said 'not like this.' And then he kissed me and I left."

"That's hardly rejection, Hermione. More like self control. Rejection is the last time I made a move on a guy: he told me to get out, remember? That's rejection."

"Ouch," Hermione said sympathetically. And then, "See, that's the commiserating sympathy thing I was talking about."

"I think he's just concerned about hurting you," Callah considered, ignoring Hermione's comment. "You've been through a lot…he wants to take it slowly. Seems to me like he just wants things to be…right. Also, have you considered that wild passionate sex might hurt? Your last sexual experience from what you've told me was far from fairy-tale. Maybe he was afraid he'd get carried away in the heat of the moment and do something that scared you or caused you pain."

"You make such an infuriatingly logical argument," Hermione groused.

"Don't I, though? You want my opinion?"

"Yes," Hermione deadpanned. Callah grinned cheekily.

"He's afraid he's in love with you. He's even more afraid of doing something to ruin it before it's started. All in all, he's just got a lot of fears."

"Figures I'd end up with that kind."

"Don't we all? No, I ended up with someone who hates himself and hates me even more…I think you got off easy. Goodnight."

"He doesn't bloody hate you…although he does hate himself, you're right about that. G'night," she yawned. There was silence. "Christ, what am I going to do when I see him tomorrow?"

"Guess we'll find out. Go to sleep."


	10. Chapter 10

Alrighty, Hand3 wins last chapter's super-quick-review award. Sorry if last chapter was short. It was actually average for me, but chapter 8 happened to be a monster. Chapter 16's turning out to be even longer than 8, and chapter length is pretty unpredictable from here on out.

Neko-P, Lil, Ed, and Hippiechick, always glad to see you! GISingerJayne, welcome back, happy to see one of my original reviewers again!

Serius Luva09, welcome to the party J . Thanks for your review on this story and on 'Normal!' Draccy, thank you for your absolutely fabulous review! I'm glad you'll be piping up to voice your opinions on my drivel from here on out! (It can only be a good thing for my ego, which is convinced that one day people are going to realize I'm not really a writer)

So, I'm going to send out the question once more before I make a decision about posting that unfinished story. It's about four-fifths written with an HG/SS in there. The relationship can be changed to HG/RL without much trouble. So, leave it as is, change pairing, or don't post at all? Thanks to all who gave their opinions, your feedback is always valued.

On with the show.

--Aimes

* * *

The morning did not assuage Hermione's nerves._ Dear Mum and Dad, today I woke up and saved the world. Unfortunately I had to kill a lot of people to do it._ She growled as she stumbled to the loo, considering exactly what she, Callah, and Snape would say to the Order. _'Hey guys, we've got a plan, only a few hundred or so of us will be killed, yeah?' Right. How about, 'The plan is complete. Casualties will only number in the hundreds.' Only? Damn._ She sighed as she brushed her teeth and washed her face, climbing into the shower with a grunt and standing beneath the hot spray. _Maybe if I remain here long enough, I'll melt into liquid and run down the drain. Yeah, that'd be good._ All too soon she was finished with her shower and began to get dressed.

_Maybe I should look a bit nicer for presenting the plan? Okay…so, skirt and blouse. Black skirt, lavender shirt…the scoop-necked one. Oh, no, wait, that one shows all my scars which seems to creep people out a bit…fuck it. Wear it anyways. I earned those bastards. _

In the end she draped a shawl over her shoulders to conceal her back and the ridges of scar tissue revealed by the blouse. Her front had escaped relatively unscarred; the scars she had began on her torso, so she felt no awkwardness revealing her chest. She slipped into loafers and went back to the bathroom. _Why am I applying makeup? It doesn't make what we're going to say any better. 'We're almost certainly sending at least three hundred of our friends and family to their deaths but my eyeliner looks good, right?' _Hermione sighed. _This would be a good moment for a funeral dirge. _

She straightened her shoulders, grabbed her notes, and proceeded downstairs.

The entire Order had collected in the grand ballroom. _Didn't even realize we had a grand ballroom…_ They watched her expectantly as she entered and stood beside Callah. Snape stood on her other side when he entered and the room fell silent, waiting.

"We have a plan," Snape said simply. _Well that takes care of how we're going to start. Brilliant, sir. Truly inspired._

The entire room nodded collectively. Hermione stepped up and for the next two hours, they explained.

When they were finished there was…silence.

"It's fucking brilliant," said Ron, awed.

"Indeed," agreed Dumbledore.

"I have a question," piped up Ginny Weasley. _ Oh, she's going to ask that question I really don't want to answer._

"Go ahead," Callah encouraged.

"What are your estimated losses in the incursion?"

Callah glanced at Hermione. _Thanks, friend of mine. _"Approximately three hundred of our forces will fall. Give or take…probably give. It's the best scenario we've come up with after running multiple simulations. Our next best plan has a body count nearing six hundred."

"Shit, that's over half our forces," noted Kingsley Shacklebolt.

"Yeah, no joke," Callah replied.

"There's the rub," Hermione said softly. "If we proceed with this, we are theoretically sending three hundred of our friends to certain death. If we do not…" she didn't finish.

"If we do not, the simulations put accumulated casualties at nearly nine hundred," Snape said quietly, "which is around three quarters of our forces. Not to mention that if we do not take action soon, Voldemort will only grow in power. Taking into consideration that our forces happen to be ourselves and our loved ones, we opted for the incursion route. Is everyone in agreement?"

There were nods throughout the room.

"Then I suggest you prepare yourselves. This will be like nothing you've ever seen," said Callah.

"Kingsley, Moody, McGonagall, Mr. Weasley, Charlie, Fred and George, and Tonks? All of you will be working with Callah. Professor Dumbledore will work with Professor Snape directly, as will Harry and Remus, and I'll handle the rest of you. Go ahead and split up whenever you're ready, I'll be in the courtyard."

Hermione turned and walked outside, seating herself behind the table on the patio. _Funny how I come out here every night and never sit at the table._ She pulled out her files, with a slight smirk. _And to think Snape made fun of me for being so organized. _

Ginny, Molly Weasley, Bill, Ron, Hagrid, Fletcher, and the remaining professors gathered before her.

"Okay, everyone has a very specific role to play in this melodrama of ours, and here are yours. Read the file and come to me individually with questions, okay? That's what I'm here for."

For the next thirty minutes or so, everyone read silently while Hermione stared into space ponderously.

Mundungus Fletcher was the first to finish reading and came to her. "So 'm I s'pposed to get this stuff fer ya?"

"Yeah, you are. Can you do it?"

"Yeh, I can do it. Do I give it to you?"

"Yes, I'll take it when you acquire it. These ingredients are needed for a very special potion."

He nodded. "I'll be leavin' immediately then to give meself time to make some, er, contacts."

Hermione smiled. "Good luck, Mundungus," she bade farewell warmly. He tottered off muttering to himself and Hermione looked down to check something off on a list she'd made.

"Um, yeah, 'Mione?"

"Yes, Ron?"

"Are you, erm, sure this is the best idea for me?"

She looked up.

"Well, what makes you uncomfortable?" she encouraged.

"I just don't know if I'm the best candidate to be in charge of student movement. I mean," he hurried on, "I know you wanted to give me an important role to make me feel good and all, but…" he faltered.

"Ron," Hermione said calmly. "I of all people would not give you a job just to make you feel good. I've made a career out of cutting you down to size. A few things you should know: we never planned out the student portion of the incursion in any detail on purpose. We wanted to leave some things loose, in order to deal with unforeseen difficulties and to provide breathing room within the infrastructure of the plan. You were chosen to direct the students for several reasons. First, because you're one of them—they'll respond to you. Second, because you have one of the finest strategic minds in existence, muggle or magical. Third, because you'll get the job done. The problem with choosing who led the students, Ron, is that we were concerned that the leader might…cave under the pressure. We can't afford for someone to be reluctant about making difficult decisions. I was with you when you played that chess game our first year; you can make the tough choices and you will make the right choices. There was no one else we considered for the job." _I sound like I'm nominating him for public office._

"Okay." Ron still seemed uncertain.

"I didn't choose you, Ron."

"What?" he asked, startled.

"I didn't choose you. In point of fact, I suggested McGonagall. Snape chose you. Said that no one else had the tactical ability to make it work properly. As it happens, we all agreed. If Snape has that much faith in you, and Merlin help you if you ever mention that to him, then you can do it. It's that simple. Now, you have the numbers and the entry points, as well as a layout of the castle and our best ideas on where everyone else will be. Get to work."

"Right. I'll update you later," Ron said firmly, picking up his folder and striding towards the manor. _He's turned into a man. How fast they grow up._ She snickered at her own thought and turned her attention to Ginny, who had taken a seat in front of her and was gazing at her placidly.

"This was…unexpected," Ginny stated.

"Yes, well, the entire situation was unexpected, wasn't it?" Hermione replied. "Your gifts lie where they lie," she shrugged.

"I expected…I'm not sure what I expected," she cocked her head thoughtfully. "But let me clarify. You want me to look…hot?"

"Crazy, I know, but remember, Ginny, you're connected to him. Seeing you will throw him off guard for just a split second, and we want to milk that. After that, your job is Peter Pettigrew and Shiv."

"What's a Shiv?"

"A…well, a demon of sorts. Her description is in your folder. She's one of our unknown quantities: powerful enough to feed him without harm to herself yet under his control. Not like Nagini—stronger. She gives him power, not just life. As sketchy as we are on the details of what she is and exactly how powerful she is, we decided to assign one of our own unknown quantities to her."

Ginny's look was shuttered.

"We know you gained powers after the incident in your second year. Believe it or not, the fact that you're the only female child in your family is also significant in determining the strength of your magic. You've got some abilities you've failed to mention to the population at large. You'll need them, I promise." Hermione tried to be as straightforward as possible. She'd known for quite some time that Ginny was more powerful than she seemed, but chose to leave that to Ginny. _Not my business that she comes up with instinctive counterhexes to spells she's never encountered before._

Ginny nodded serenely. "My mum'll be furious."

"She was furious when we said you were part of the plan," Hermione shrugged again. "Of course we pointed out that nothing short of a full body-bind would likely keep you away and she saw reason."

"About my powers," Ginny began, stopping as Hermione held up a hand.

"Not my concern, Ginny. I know you have them, but how far they extend is a surprise better kept for the battlefield. You've been secretive and I understand why. Don't tell me out of a misguided sense of obligation. If I never know, it won't bother me."

Ginny nodded gratefully.

"Verse yourself on Shiv. If you have any further questions about her, go ahead and talk to Snape. He'll be more helpful. Good luck." Hermione scribbled a quick note in the margin of her paper as Ginny retreated to the lawn once more.

_Ginny's in. Her new magic should be useful, as long as I'm not overestimating it… Ron will be just fine, I think. Fletcher will do as he's told. So will Bill and Molly, based on the nods from that direction. So Hagrid's the only one who hasn't really checked in…where has he gotten to?_

"Penny for your thoughts?" interrupted a mild voice. Hermione started slightly and looked up.

"Aren't you assigned to Severus?" she teased as she set her pen down.

"We're all finished up. I came to see how you're doing." Remus took a seat facing her, leaning on the glass surface of the table. He glanced at her pen curiously.

"Callah's. She's not a quill person. And I'm doing just fine, actually. Everyone seems okay with their jobs…of course I haven't spoken to Hagrid, but it should be fine. Are you okay with your role?"

"Yes," he replied slowly. "Though I'm left to wonder why me?"

"You're the only one other than McGonagall and Snape strong enough. Snape has to be in the Hall for obvious reasons and so does McGonagall—we need at least one senior staff member on hand. That leaves you." Hermione stretched and sat back in her chair.

"You're powerful enough."

"Possibly. My strength is only conjecture—I'm a smart chick but that doesn't mean I can do a binding spell of that magnitude—even with the potion to help. I also have to be in the Hall as a moral support thing—if Harry doesn't have both Ron and I there, he's far more likely to crumble, according to our simulations."

"Don't tell him that," Remus warned with a smile. "He may not take well to being a variable in a simulation."

"Are you kidding? The fate of the wizarding world rests on his shoulders. Variable is the least of it." Hermione retorted incredulously.

"He's still a person, Hermione," he pointed out.

"Yes, and if he'd like to remain a breathing person, he'd better deal with his issues quick, fast, and in a hurry," she countered. "Look, I know all this prophecy bullshit sucks since he's still young, but we've all made our sacrifices. He's responsible for the wizarding world? So am I. I'm responsible for everyone who takes part in this attack and I'm doubly responsible for everyone who dies. Ron's responsible for the lives of our entire seventh year class. It sucks that Harry's a kid; so are the rest of us, but this is a war. At least adulthood will be a cakewalk if we make it that far." _Oi__, I think that was Snape talking._

"Somehow, I think adulthood would be a cakewalk for you in any case, Hermione. I've got to go talk to Callah, I'll see you later," he ended the conversation abruptly as Hagrid ambled over.

Hermione raised an eyebrow at him then took a deep breath as Hagrid began to stumble through his concerns. _Even my days with the Lestranges didn't last this long._


	11. Chapter 11

Alrighty. This is a really short chapter, sorry. It didn't tack on to the last one and didn't work with the next one so I just left it by itself. Kinda puny, I know, but I'll post more in the morning to make up for it.

This chapter's super-quick review award would go to Lily except that she knew I was posting, so no dice. It thus gets passed to Joots, who was second in line. I appreciated your feedback. Hand3, good to see you as always. Just so you're not worried, Ginny does not die (never even entertained the thought of killing her), and the tension between Remus and Hermione kinda gets resolved and sort of doesn't. You'll see…

RubyMalfoy, so glad to see you once more! Thank you so much for reviewing on every chapter instead of doing one at the end. It was nice to get all those reviews!

Nenharmen, welcome to the show. Glad to hear you've been reading my stuff, thank you for reviewing.

Draccy, you're a sweetie! Ed, lovely to hear from you again. And Hippiechick…couldn't post another chapter without hearing from you!

Okay, two things. First, I know my author's notes are really long, but I'm so grateful for your reviews that I enjoy thanking you. Feel free to skip 'em, but they're not getting any shorter. Second, thank you to everyone who voiced an opinion on the story I've not yet posted. I think I've had more votes to change the relationship so I'm going back and re-reading what I've got to see if that's really as possible as I said it was J. I'll give you a little mini-summary in the next chapter, but for now, enjoy.

--Aimes

* * *

It was one a.m. and it didn't look like anyone was planning on sleeping. Hermione stretched out on the soft carpet and sipped at a gin and tonic whilst observing the room. They were sitting in a heretofore generally unused room—a huge living room with one wall entirely of windows looking out onto the backyard. The furniture in here was comfortable and well used and there was a fully stocked bar in the corner. _So why haven't we been using this room for conferences? Probably because everyone would get raging drunk halfway through…_ She took another sip of her drink. _Everyday I come one step closer to alcoholism. _Hermione glanced at Snape who was four scotch-on-the-rocks in and completely silent. _And it looks as though some of us have made it quite past that point. Glad he was able to get away and hold this completely pointless vigil with us. And what have we here? Callah going over to comfort Severus? Hope she knows what she's doing._

Callah apparently thought the better of it and went to speak to Remus instead, motioning him over to Snape. Snape looked up just in time for Callah to hug Remus and a stormy look passed over his face for a split second.

"What's going through your brilliant head, 'Mione?" Hermione glanced up and smiled welcomingly at Ron, who sat near her and took stock of the room as well.

"Not a whole lot, Ron. Thinking about alcoholism and near-death experiences."

"Yeah, I saw Callah's near miss too." Hermione started slightly and looked over at him appraisingly. "You'd have to be blind," he replied with a shrug. _True._

"What are you thinking about on this momentous occasion?" she asked wryly.

"My Slytherin," he sighed.

"Did someone mention Blaise?" came Ginny's melancholy voice. She plopped down next to Ron and leaned against the wall.

"Nah, he was referring to Draco," replied Harry pensively as he settled himself on the other side of Hermione.

"Actually, he was referring to Millicent," Hermione snickered. "Unless you'd like to imply that Blaise and Draco are his. Mind you after the thong incident, Blaise is damaged enough. Implying he was Ron and Draco's sex toy might push him over the edge."

Ginny began laughing and before long, the entire group was shaking with mirth. The other occupants of the room looked over with something akin to incredulity. Their expressions only made the quartet laugh harder, naturally.

"Bloody hell I'm terrified," Ginny said through her laughter.

"Me too!" Ron chimed in. Their humour subsided instantly.

"Terrified doesn't even begin to cover what I am," Harry supplied tensely. Hermione shrugged.

"I think I've passed the point of fear into shell-shocked acceptance of whatever happens."

"Well this isn't supposed to be the final battle of the war, it's just to take back Hogwarts" Ron pitched helpfully.

"But it will be," Hermione replied heavily. "Everyone knows it ends here."

"I just wanted to tell you guys that I love you," Ginny said softly. "I don't say it nearly enough. You're all so important to me. Ron, you niffler big brother of mine. Harry, you brave hero. I worshipped you when I was younger, I still worship you. Hermione. The brains of the operation, definitely, but also the wit, humour, and grace. You're the sister I always wanted and the friend I've always needed." Tears stood in her eyes.

"As long as we're doing affirmations," Hermione replied. "You know you're my only family. You three and Snape are all I've got left in the world and I love you dearly for it. Ron's wicked chess skills, Harry's penchant for mischief, Ginny's ability to make a frog feel like a princess. Be safe for me. I can't handle losing anyone else." There was a moment of silence as Harry, Ron, and Ginny digested one of Hermione's few acknowledgments of her losses.

"I think, of any of us, you've suffered most in this war, 'Mione," Harry said quietly. "I mean, I lost my parents when I was a baby and I lost Sirius, but you…you had to run, knowing there was nothing you could do. When they kidnapped you, I nearly lost my mind with worry. We all did. For you to come out of that with your sanity intact was miraculous. No one ever told us what they did to you, but I can surely imagine."

Hermione's hands had wandered back to each other and she rubbed at the fingers on her right hand, a gesture that did not escape Harry's notice.

"If you really want to know…" she said faintly, "I'm as ready as I'll ever be to tell you."

Ron was the first to speak. "Yes," he stated simply.

Hermione was silent for a moment, collecting her thoughts.

"When I came to, I was hanging from the ceiling in a concrete room. Voldemort was there and so were Bellatrix and Dayrin Lestrange. Voldemort questioned me…I wasn't very responsive. No, let me correct that, I was a smart-ass. He slapped me so hard I almost blacked out again then left me to the tender ministrations of Bellatrix and Dayrin.

"The first two days or so were Bellatrix and her odd fondness for whips. And fire. The combination was pretty painful. She Crucio'd me several times, but I suspect Voldemort had told her not to damage my mind." Hermione was staring at nothing and the entire room was now listening, riveted.

"After that, Dayrin took over. Standard torture stuff, mostly, hexes, knives, fire, and the like. Every night, Snape would patch me up as best he could and every day, Dayrin would start again. Snape was my only window to the outside, and there were days when I survived only for the thought that he'd come for me later. I knew he'd get me out; I had utter faith in him." Snape's eyes closed briefly before resettling on her.

"Only a few incidents really stand out as being ridiculously terrible. They, ah, pulled my nails out. All of them. Individually." She shuddered and gripped her fingers. "I can honestly put that as the single most painful experience of my entire life. I can't imagine anything coming close to it. That night…I'm pretty sure I asked Severus to let me die. Gods, I wanted nothing more than to die. If I'm not mistaken, he flat out said no and it was never mentioned again." Snape had stiffened at the recollection. It was the first time this particular moment had ever been spoken of since that night.

"The other really painful day was…" her voice faded out for a moment. Ginny looked at Ron and Harry with concern. Concern that they should never have asked this, concern that perhaps Hermione shouldn't relive this. Hermione's voice came back, strong again. "The day or night…I really don't know…that Dayrin raped me. To say that hurt…would be beyond understatement. I'll spare you the details of that fun time…" she suddenly froze and looked at Snape. "What happened to it?" He looked confused for a moment.

"The pipe? What happened to it?" Ginny gagged and Ron looked incredibly green. Harry swore his heart stopped for a few moments as comprehension hit him. A pipe.

"I cast it out to sea," he replied softly. Hermione nodded to herself. _I'd wondered._ No one could look her quite in the eye except for Snape and Callah. Hermione gazed back at Callah and saw it flicker through her eyes. _Understanding.__ She's been through it before…I suppose it makes sense. She's a spy, spies get captured occasionally. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. _

She didn't know what motivated her to rise and go to Snape, placing a cool gentle hand on his face. She heard herself speak suddenly. "Severus. If…" she didn't finish. He nodded.

"If I can, Hermione, I will."

"Thank you," she said gratefully as she walked back to her spot on the carpet and lowered herself gracefully.

"What are you talking about?" Harry asked dangerously. Hermione found the courage to look at him directly._ He deserves that much I think._

"If, somehow, I'm captured again tomorrow…I want Severus to promise…to promise…"_ C'mon Mya, inability to speak has never been one of your problems._

"She wants me to promise to kill her this time." __

Harry's expression turned stormy, angry.

"No, Harry," Hermione said firmly. The rest of the group was trying to politely ignore the encounter whilst watching very closely. "I'd rather die than do it again."

"Then I guess we can't let you get captured," he replied determinedly. "It looks like we've got to win no matter what then."

"We'll win," Hermione said with a confidence she didn't feel. "But some will escape, undoubtedly. And if I happen to be in the clutches of one of those…" she let the statement go incomplete. __

"You won't be," Ginny assured her, fire sparking in her eyes. "Not if I'm still breathing."

"Same here," Ron added fiercely. Next to Severus, Remus felt a pang of regret that he would not be there for her, to protect her. He banished the thought quickly and refocused on the group as Hermione spoke.

"Thanks guys," Hermione said softly, moved by their fierce loyalty. _In three hours and fifty-two minutes, we're going to do the impossible. And we'd sure as hell better succeed._

She closed her eyes and tried to prepare for the inevitable.


	12. Chapter 12

Sooo….no one gets the super-quick review award since I didn't actually get any reviews for the last chapter L. Here's the next chapter anyways…

I said I'd put in a mini-summary, but you'll have to wait a bit for that, sorry.

Here we go.

--Aimes

* * *

_Eight forty-five a.m.__ This has been going for over three hours now._

The plan had gone smoothly for the most part: the giants had kept their appointed meeting with Voldemort and in the midst of the welcoming, Madame Maxine used a potion to channel Dumbledore and break through the new wards. The onslaught began.

Ron had divided the castle and its grounds into sectors and had deployed students according to their familiarity with the areas. It had worked beautifully, with ninety-seven percent of the castle being recaptured within the first hour and a half. It was a good thing too: Snape had calculated that if the majority of the castle was not reclaimed within the first two hours of the battle, they'd almost definitely lose.

Remus and Dumbledore were presumably working on binding the magic of the Deatheaters. _Not as successfully as we'd hoped, apparently, considering they're still hexing some of us into next week._ She gave Padma Patil a wry glance as the girl hit a table. The body count was rising, and not just amongst the enemy. Colin and Dennis Creevey had gone down in the beginning of the onslaught and neither had yet risen. _Judging from the amount of Killing Curses being fired off, I'm going to be attending a lot of funerals._

Ginny Weasley had managed to destroy Shiv in the dungeons, though no one knew exactly how she'd done it. Her appearance in the Great Hall had thrown Voldemort off for just a split second and Harry took the opportunity to throw off his invisibility cloak and attack. The battle had begun…and not ended.

Hermione ducked as Crabbe…or was it Goyle? Well, one of them went flying over her. Ginny looked up and winked.

"Always wanted to do that," she shouted before turning and punching a random Deatheater in the face as he raised his wand.

Hermione ducked again as Goyle…or was it Crabbe?…followed his chum in a trajectory that happened to arc directly above her.

"No joke," agreed Luna dreamily as she watched her victim hit a wall. "He groped me once," she shared confidentially. Ginny was about to scream a warning to her when she turned casually and hexed Pansy Parkinson.

Hermione raised an eyebrow at Ginny before returning her attention to Narcissa Malfoy. "You've got serious issues," she spat as she dodged a rather half-hearted looking Crucio.

"Filthy mudblood bitch!" came the venomous reply.

"Bloody hell, doesn't _anyone_ have some originality?" she shot off a stunner that Narcissa deflected with ease.

"Diseased daughter of a perverted hippogriff!" growled Narcissa. Hermione drew up short with an impressed look on her face. _Well that was unexpected. _She narrowly avoided a curse she didn't recognize and tripped over Crabbe's inert body, grunting as she connected with the hard floor.

Narcissa loomed over her with a lethal smile, raised her wand…and hit the ground as Hermione lunged upward with her legs and scissored her down.

"Fuck! Do you know how much these robes cost?" she shrieked as Goyle's blood traced Rorschach patterns on her icy blue robes.

"Hey, you're the nitwit who wore light colored robes to a meeting with Voldemort. What did you think would happen?" Hermione retorted nastily, scrabbling for her wand and casting a particularly harsh jelly-legs hex at an approaching Deatheater. Both of them were on their feet in seconds.

"Look, hexing my son's friends was not how I planned to spend my day, little girl. _I_ was going to make the requisite breakfast appearance then go shopping for books, and don't you _dare_ give me that look, young lady, I _do _have an advanced university degree in Arithmancy! Contrary to popular belief, I am neither stupid nor delusional, I was merely unlucky enough to fall in love with a degenerate bastard!" She turned and hexed Crabbe Sr. into oblivion. "I am _trying_ to have a conversation here, Matthew! Don't even _think_ about it!" she hissed at Goyle Sr. who immediately turned his attention to Ron Weasley. Hermione could do little more than stand and watch in amazement.

"Now," said Narcissa, composing herself, "where was I? Oh yes, _I_ hate these bloody fiascoes. Complete cock-ups is what they are. If the idiots would just plan things out, all of this could—"

"Duck!" Hermione yelled as Alastor Moody cast a hex at Narcissa. _Quick reflexes,_ Hermione thought as Narcissa hit the ground and Hermione herself lunged to the left. Moody was quickly distracted again but not before he managed to bark at Hermione to mind her duties.

Hermione looked over at Narcissa who looked back over at her with an extremely tired and frustrated countenance. "Would you just knock me out please?" she begged. Hermione shrugged and hit her with a stunner. "Thanks," Narcissa grunted.

_That was the single most bizarre experience I've ever had._

Hermione stood and surveyed the room, dodging stray curses, watching people rise and fall. Ron was engaged fiercely with Goyle and another Deatheater whom she couldn't immediately recognize. From across the room she saw Neville dealing out some justice to Bellatrix Lestrange. _Neville livid is actually a fairly intimidating sight._ Most of the giants had fallen as had many centaurs and lycanthropes. And entirely too many humans. _Not the issue right now._

Her eyes zeroed in on the object of her hate. Dayrin Lestrange looked up and saw her just as she located him. Hermione hesitated, her wand aimed. _To kill or not to kill, that is the question. Whether tis better to watch the scum die quickly or suffer protracted agony long into the future…_

She didn't have time to finish before he raised his wand and she pulled out her knife reflexively. _Thanks, Daddy._ It hit him with deadly accuracy, sliding through his flesh like butter and severing an artery. He went down like a stone. _Well that settles that._

She looked around and saw Snape gazing at her with an odd sort of sadness about him. Before Hermione could reflect much upon it, he nodded and went back to work on the Dementor he was currently hexing into oblivion. Hermione again surveyed the scene.

"You insufferable, ungrateful demon of a child!" someone screamed. Hermione looked around and saw Draco deflecting a curse aimed for Ginny. The screamer had been Peter Pettigrew. _Bloody sleaze bucket is what he is. _"You will pay for your disloyalty!" Pettigrew raged. Draco easily dodged the curse.

"You were pathetic years ago according to my mother. Not much has changed from the looks of it," Draco derided. _Oi__, Draco, can you never control your mouth? Heh, dear pot, love kettle, eh? I'm a fine one to talk about mouth-controlling issues._

Pettigrew turned red and dropped like a stone as Ginny decided to return the favor to Draco. He fell under a particularly unpleasant looking hex. _Ew__. Pus-filled boils are pretty high on my list of gross things. And let us note that we never learned such a spell._

Hermione saw Voldemort a moment before he fired off the Cruciatus, felling Draco. _Gods, that's gotta be the most painful Cruciatus in the wizarding world. I've got to do something._

She sprinted over to help Draco and Callah disengaged herself from a Deatheater to join the mad dash to Draco's aid. Hermione stopped short as Lucius Malfoy suddenly fell at the hands of Voldemort and Draco released from the curse. _Well shit. Malfoys are just full of surprises, aren't they?_

Callah kept going, trying to avoid bodies and curses, desperately trying to reach Bill Weasley in time.

"Bill!" she shouted. "Move, dammit!" He turned at the sound of her voice, barely registering when the Killing Curse hit him from a Deatheater struggling on the ground—Dolohov. Callah caught him as he crumpled to the ground, watching the light flicker from his eyes. Enraged, she looked down at Dolohov who was suddenly alight with angry blue flames. He screamed and writhed as she watched with cold detachment.

Hermione tore her attention from the scene just in time to get hit with a binding spell by Narcissa. _Damn, should've double checked when I knocked her out._ She slumped, not even trying to fight the curse, simply watching as everyone died. Or so it seemed to her.

"Sorry," Narcissa apologized. Hermione looked up at her. "Well, I didn't want to kill you. I've never killed anyone before and my son seems to rather like you so…" she shrugged. "But I suppose I should be doing _something_ as long as I'm conscious and all." Hermione managed a slight grunt of agreement. _I really hope they don't send her to Azkaban. I could probably get to like her._

She turned her attention back to the battle, instinctively fighting the charm as she saw Fred Weasley being gripped tightly by a Dementor. _No! Not Fred, please, not Fred. George will die without him._ A helpless whimper escaped her lips as he slowly went limp in the Dementor's arms. Narcissa looked up from Susan Bones' broken body and cast off the Dementor, moving quickly to check Fred's pulse and frowning when she found none.

Hermione was distracted from the odd sight by Snape rising behind Voldemort, who was unfortunately beating the crap out of Harry, and slitting his throat. _Wait, slitting his throat?__ Snape has a knife? Hang on, Snape has MY knife!_ He glanced at her and nodded, returning to the task at hand while Harry engaged once again with Voldemort. This time he had the advantage: slitting Voldemort's throat hadn't killed him, obviously, but it had shocked and weakened him long enough for Harry to gain the upper hand.

Narcissa came back to Hermione and released the spell. "Changed my mind," she said ruefully.

"I noticed," Hermione rasped. "Thanks." Narcissa shrugged. Hermione began to clamber to her feet but was unpleasantly obstructed by Narcissa's newly unconscious body slamming her back into the ground. Her head snapped back and consciousness abandoned her permanently.


	13. Chapter 13

To all of you concerned that Hermione's going to get captured again, don't be worried! Actually, the fight scene ended the way it did because of the way I wrote it in 'Normal.'

Okeydokey, so I got a veritable jackpot of reviews this morning.

Lily gets the super-quick reviewer award for Chapter 11. Ruby Malfoy was right behind her and I'd like to give a special little hug to Ruby for adding my stories to her website. That's so flattering; thank you, hon! Joots and Hippiechick, thanks for your reviews as always! I never get tired of hearing from you.

Ed, you get the super-quick reviewer award for Chapter 12! Lickety-split, I tell you. Hand3, if you hexed me I'd never finish the story, would I? But here's an earlier-than-usual update just for you.

So it seems my server was lagging which is why I thought I had no reviews for Chapter 11. Again, many thanks to all of you who review my stuff!

So…chapter 13.

--Aimes

* * *

_Ow__. My head feels like roadkill._

"Poppy! She's awake!" _That didn't help._ Hermione cracked her eyes and immediately regretted it as light attacked her optic nerve. She let out a small grunt and experimented with moving, turning her head to the side. Silvery blue-grey eyes gazed back at her and she flinched involuntarily before registering that it was Remus, sitting next to the bed and resting his head on her pillow.

"I'm alive."

"So it would seem," came another, silky voice. Hermione raised her head and saw Severus reclining against a wall, watching Callah, silent and still in the next bed.

"How did I get here? Who won?"

"I brought you and who do you think?"

"Hey, my head feels like it got sledgehammered alright? I'm entitled to some obviously stupid questions." Snape raised an eyebrow at her and seemed about to speak.

"Shut up." He smirked.

"Stop smirking." He sneered.

"Stop…ah hell, never mind." _He's entirely too difficult to deal with in the morning. Is it morning? Well it is for me._

As though in response to her unspoken thought, Snape nodded to her tersely and left. Hermione looked at Remus, who continued to watch her silently. "Remus?"

"Hm?"

"You're very quiet."

"I was just watching you."

"I noticed. See anything particularly exciting?"

"Your eyes opening just about made my lifetime." He leaned forward and kissed her forehead.

"Remus," she whispered. He rested his forehead against hers and kissed her lips lightly. Hermione felt the thrill of electricity shoot through her.

"You should rest," he murmured against her lips, darting his tongue out to lick her.

"Bloody tease," she grumbled. He pressed his lips against hers once more, gentle and longing, before caressing her face gently and leaving the infirmary. _Ah hell. Messiness alert. _

"Methinks you're finally gonna get laid," came a ragged voice from the bed next to her.

"Callah?"

"Yeah, I woke up just in time to see Remus molesting you in public."

"Shut up, wanker. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, other than the samba pounding itself out in my head and the fact that breathing hurts like hell, I'm peachy."

They fell into silence for a moment.

"It's over then," Hermione said softly.

"Yeah," Callah agreed. "Harry annihilated Voldemort and we finished off most of the Deatheaters, Dementors, and other creepy crawly uglies in pretty good time once the binding spell kicked in."

"What happened to you?"

"Bad pumpkin juice."

Hermione looked over at her with incredulity. Callah shrugged and managed a weak grin.

"Just kidding. Imperius and a window." Hermione shot her a shocked look even as Callah began to drift off. _They forced her to jump out a window? Ouch…_

"Well," she said dreamily. "'Night then." Hermione watched her breathing even out then struggled into a sitting position.

"Miss Granger, I am glad to see you feeling better." Hermione started slightly as she noticed Dumbledore at the foot of her bed. _Sneaky, for one of the over-hundred set._

"Thank you sir." He handed her a scroll. "What's this?" she asked.

"It is a list of the dead. I thought you might want to see it," he said solemnly, the twinkle vanished from his eye.

"Thank you, sir," she murmured. She picked it up and began to skim through it, the names burning themselves into her mind alphabetically. _So many dead.__ The giants were decimated and so was the lycanthrope population. They'll get going again quickly enough. Several centaurs…damn, __Firenze__? Not as many as I thought, though. _

She looked up at Dumbledore. "Did we get all the Deatheaters?"

"No. Very nearly, but there are still some out there."

"How many?" _All that and we still didn't win. Not completely._

"We cannot know for certain, but I would guess at least thirty or forty. Most of them were lesser supporters of Voldemort, but we believe that at least seven of his inner circle survived."

"I see," she sighed heavily. "That's it then? Two hundred and fifty four of our people dead, and we didn't finish the job. Then again, we didn't really expect to, did we?"

"No. But do not fear. We shall rid our world of the others in due time," he said reassuringly. "I wanted to thank you, Hermione. You are up for an Order of Merlin First Class, you know."

"Don't thank me for getting two hundred and fifty people killed," Hermione replied. "And I think Severus deserves that Order of Merlin a hell of a lot more than I do."

"He too has been nominated for the award. Along with Ronald, Remus, and Minerva. And Harry, of course. Miss Riese has declined the honor on the grounds that she is not technically a witch."

"I see. Do you know, for the rest of my life I will be able to recall every single name on this list?"

"Yes. And that is as it should be, Hermione. You planned and helped lead one of the greatest incursions in wizard history. That makes you responsible for the failures as well as the successes. But do not make the mistake of thinking the losses outweigh the victories. In the end, the lives saved far outnumber the lives lost."

"Tell that to the families of the dead," she replied tiredly. He nodded silently, understanding. _At least he didn't try to feed me that bullshit line about it not being my fault. I led therefore I am at fault if those I led died._

"'Mione!" She looked over to see Harry jogging towards her with Ginny and Ron in tow.

"Harry? Ron? Ginny? You're all okay?" _They're alive, they're alive, they're alive. _

"Yeah, we're fine. Bumps and bruises is all. Gin got a wicked scar though, check it out!" effused Ron. Dumbledore had quietly taken his leave during their approach.

Hermione saw the scar running diagonally on Ginny's high cheekbone. "It'll fade," she told Ginny reassuringly.

Ginny nodded and smiled slightly.

"Ginny, how'd you defeat Shiv?"

"Trade secret," Ginny said with a smile. "Shiv was a meta-demon. She took form based on your worst fears, or greatest desires, but if you feared nothing and desired nothing, she could not exist. I just drew upon some personal tricks to joy her to death."

Hermione nodded, smiling. That was not the whole story, she could see it in Ginny's eyes, but it was her choice what to reveal.

"Where's Draco and the other Slytherins?"

"Draco's still in bed, like you, and the other Slytherins are watching over him. We only came cause you regained consciousness. We heard Remus shouting for Madam Pomfrey," replied Ginny.

"Um. I know this is going to sound a bit…odd, but…what happened to Narcissa? Malfoy," she added hastily, just in case.

"Because there are so many other Narcissas around," Harry teased. "Strange, that one, I tell you. She saved Neville from becoming very dead and was hit by a stray curse that sent her flying into you. She's with Draco right now, in between helping out with the other wounded."

"Ah, gotcha. She's a character, that one." _Character indeed.___

"Seriously," Ginny agreed. "Married one hell of a crazy bastard, though. Did you know she's got an advanced degree in Arithmancy? Not quite the vacuous blonde people make her out to be."

"Not by a long shot," Hermione said dryly. "How's everyone else?"

"Um, well, Susan, Parvati, Colin, Dennis, Michael Corner, Trelawney, and Seamus didn't make it," Harry said quietly, the mood sobering instantly. "And Lavender." _Yes, I saw those names on the list. Kingsley didn't make it either, nor did Mad-Eye. I know every name on that list. _

"Neither did Blaise," Ginny whispered. _I know._

"Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry," Hermione said gently, wrapping an arm around the suddenly teary Ginny.

"Bill and Fred didn't make it either," Ron said stoically. Hermione looked at him in sad horror.

"I'm so sorry," came Callah's voice, unexpectedly. "I tried so hard to make it to Bill on time. I was so close…and I failed completely."

"I know," replied Ron. "It's not your fault, Callah. Narcissa said the same thing about Fred…she tried to save him but there just wasn't enough time."

"Oh, Ron," Hermione breathed, pulling him into her embrace. Ron trembled for a moment then crumpled when Harry placed a comforting hand on his back. Ginny and Ron cried brokenheartedly against Hermione who locked Harry's haunted gaze, motioning to him with her eyes. He climbed onto the foot of her bed and rested his head on her lap, beginning to cry himself when Ginny and Ron wrapped their arms around him. Hermione held them all, dry eyed, sad.

_They're so young to lose so much, see so much death. This is Ron and Ginny's first real experience of it. They were there when Sirius died, but that was so different. So painless and quiet. So detached—it happened to Harry, not really to them. And now Bill and Fred are gone. Victims of a war they should never have had to fight, against a madman who should never have survived the first war. And what of George? How will he survive without his other half?_

_But that's life, I suppose. None of us have ever really had a choice, we just take what's given to us. And now it will be left to us to rebuild as well. As though fighting the war were not enough._

Hermione sighed aloud, tiredly, and Ginny looked up.

"Oh, 'Mione, you should sleep, sweetie. We need to check on the others anyways." Hermione managed a wan smile.

"I'll be fine, hon. You take care of yourself. And let me give you all some advice." They looked at her raptly. "Talk to someone. Whether it's each other or a therapist, talk. And if you want a therapist, I know a woman who's phenomenal."

"We'll think about it, 'Mione," Ginny murmured. "Now get some rest," she sniffled, pulling herself together. She took Ron and Harry by the hands and led them away.

Hermione looked over at the other bed.

"Why did you try to save Bill?" she asked with no small amount of trepidation. "And please don't think I'm questioning your actions, I just want to understand you better."

"I know. He didn't deserve to die."

"Is that why?"

Callah sighed. "Yes. And because every dead soldier on our side was a small victory for the other side."

"So it was all a game to you?"

"It was all a mental exercise. That doesn't make it any less important that I saved lives or any less terrible that I killed people, I'm sure, but does it matter why?"

"Maybe it does, I don't know," Hermione replied honestly. "Or maybe I should take Severus' advice and simply accept that you generally do the right thing for whatever reason."

"It's your decision," Callah replied neutrally.

"What comes after this?"

"You have to decide what to do about Remus. I'm going to Italy to work with the Italian secret service for the next few years. I'm thinking of renting or buying a villa. Establishing a life. Maybe. You know, there's an Institute of Archaeological Studies in Italy, close to where I'm going to be. I'm sure they'd kill for a smart witch to teach excavation procedures to."

"Italy," Hermione said dreamily. "I love Italy. I always told Mum I wanted to live there for awhile after school."

"If you'd like…"

"Thanks," Hermione smiled warmly. "You know, I think I could like living in an Italian villa with you."

"I really do consider you a friend," Callah said sincerely.

"I know," Hermione replied confidently. "I consider you a friend too." She smiled. "I've got to break this to the others…I doubt they'll like me bailing so soon."

"Break what?" asked Narcissa Malfoy.

"You!" Hermione said gleefully.

"Yes, I made it. And switched sides, I suppose. Now that my son's involved with Harry Potter, I suppose some changes are in my future. I'll stand trial but since I helped in the end, they probably won't be too harsh on me. Lucius was a dangerous man to cross. My son and Harry are apparently going to travel for the next few years before settling down. Ronald Weasley is being recruited by the Chudley Cannons. His little sister still has a year at Hogwarts, if I'm not mistaken. That sweet young boy, Neville? Wants to become an Auror. He'll be fine at it, I think," Narcissa chattered as she fixed Hermione's pillows and handed her some potions. Hermione gazed at her in astonishment.

"You hear a lot when you're being a makeshift nurse."

"Yeah, apparently," Hermione laughed.

"Go to sleep, the potion should be making you drowsy. That guy with the silvery eyes will be back soon to watch over you, no doubt." She smirked as she moved away. Hermione shot her a wilting glare as the potion took hold and she slipped into a gentle sleep.

_First I've got to deal with Remus. Lovely._


	14. Chapter 14

Ahoy, there.

So, Chapter 13's super-quick reviewer award goes to….GISingerJayne! Yaaay! Lily, Hippiechick, Hand3, good to see you all again. Welcome back, Ruby. Nope, I don't have a livejournal, sorry :(

Few things: yep, Narcissa's a character, but then I kind of thought she'd have to be. With a husband like Lucius and a son like Draco, she's got to have some sense of irony. I'm not sure if the Dementor's kiss kills, I really didn't check my facts (sorry, laziness attack). We'll pretend it's like AIDS and say Fred died of secondary complications, eh?

Also…Remus and Hermione sorta kinda allude to past experiences in 'Normal' but nothing's ever said explicitly. They just fall into bed together, actually.

This chapter's gonna have to hold you all over for a good long while, I'm taking a three-day road trip as of tomorrow morning. I'll post again on Tuesday. In the meanwhile…review! Well, review if you want to; I'm not going to force anyone (and couldn't if I wanted to).

Enjoy!

--Aimes

* * *

When Hermione awoke again, Poppy Pomfrey was speaking in low tones to someone next to her. _Remus__?__ Ugh, down, girl. _

"She'll need to be watched carefully. She's not in any dire condition but she needs rest and attention. Here are the potions she'll need to take. When she wakes, I'll ask her if she feels well enough to leave. If so, I'll remand her to your care." _Who would you happen to be?_

"I'm awake," Hermione mumbled. Pomfrey looked over and smiled widely.

"So you are, my dear. I'm releasing you into the care of Professor Lupin. Is that acceptable to you? He's been watching over you for the last few days," she whispered revealingly. _Oh lord, this is going to be spread around so fast…_

"That's fine," Hermione assured her. "When can I leave?"

"As soon as you wish, my dear. I hate to let you go so soon, but there are others who need to be treated as well…" she let the statement trail off as a fretful look swept across her features.

"Don't worry Madam Pomfrey, I'm sure Remus will take excellent care of me," Hermione said comfortingly. "If I may ask, when will Callah be released?"

"Oh, that one," Pomfrey said disapprovingly. "She'll need at least two or three more days, I think. Even then, we'll see. Seems like the type who'd try to run a marathon a week after being forced to jump out a window several stories up." She clucked her tongue reproachfully. "Young people today take terrible care of themselves." After bestowing a quick hug upon Hermione and one last warning to Remus to watch her carefully, Pomfrey moved on to another patient.

"Is she gone?" Callah sounded wary.

"Yeah, and in a few moments I will be too. I'll come back and visit in a couple of days though…maybe you'll be released by then," Hermione replied as she struggled out of bed, leaning heavily on Remus. He smiled down at her.

"Well I'll have nothing better to do than recuperate and whine to Madam Pomfrey to let me go," Callah said with a shrug. "You're the only person who'd visit me."

"Somehow I don't think that's the case," Hermione grinned. "Ron, Ginny, Harry and Draco are headed this way."

"Hey, 'Mione! Up and about then?"

"She's being released to my care," Lupin volunteered. "She's not to overexert herself for the next few days and she's not to get out of bed unnecessarily."

"Pomfrey got to you too," Draco said knowingly, leaning on Ginny. "My mum's head was spinning after all the directions she was given."

"I'll see you guys in a few days," Hermione said with a chuckle. _Note to self, laughing hurts._ "Keep Callah company, eh?"

"'Course," Ron replied with a smile. "She'll be so sick of us she'll be begging to get out of here."

"I'm already begging to be out of here, and it's not because of you!" Callah groaned.

Harry laughed as he handed Hermione's bag to Remus.

"Take good care of our best friend, Remus," he warned teasingly. Lupin smiled in response.

"Feel better, 'Mione. We'll see you in a few days, right?" asked Ginny.

"Yup. I'm just going to rest up for a bit while Remus waits on me hand and foot. You'll see me soon, I promise," Hermione replied. Ginny gave her a gentle hug, and Ron and Harry quickly followed suit. Hermione gave a quick wave as she and Remus departed. Remus shifted slightly to take on more of her weight as they walked, while Hermione searched for something to say.

_So, how are you? How's it going? In the mood to shag me silly? Great, sounds good, no backing out last second this time, okay? Damn. How long am I staying with him? This could easily be a nightmare._

She grunted as they started down the stairs and Remus looked over with concern. "Are you okay, Hermione?"

"Yeah, sure," she managed. "Stairs. Love 'em." He raised an eyebrow but said nothing. _Yeah, shove off, werewolf. _A moment later: _So do I want him to shag me or shove off? They say women are fickle, but this is a bit absurd._

"Have you been released, Miss Granger, or are you simply making a run for it?" The smooth voice startled her and she almost tripped on the stairs. Remus' arm tightened around her and she shot him a grateful smile.

"If I'm making a run for it, I'm not doing a very good job, am I? Can't even make it down the steps by myself," Hermione replied, amusement sparkling in her eyes.

"So it would seem," Snape said mildly. A moment later, he had her in his arms and was carrying her gracefully down the stairs. Remus watched with a look of…irritation? _Does it bother him….? Nah, can't be. Snape's like family to me._

Snape set her down at the bottom of the steps and looked impatiently at Remus, who sped up his descent. His arm wrapped around Hermione once more, holding her up.

"So, going to see Callah?"

His omnipresent glare turned glacial. "What on earth would give you that impression, Miss Granger?"

_Oh, I don't know, you waiting at her bedside for the last few days? You thought I was sleeping, didn't you? You are so smitten, Severus._

"Sorry sir, just me being silly I suppose. How are you feeling?"

"I'm just fine, Miss Granger."

"The remaining Deatheaters have been attacking you through the Dark Mark and you were nearly killed in that battle," Remus contradicted him. "If not for your decidedly stubborn insistence on leaving the infirmary, you'd still be on more potions than most people consume in a lifetime."

"Someone needs to brew the potions being used," Snape hissed. "I am most capable."

"And as fascinating as this pointless argument is, can we continue it when I'm sitting?" interjected Hermione. "We all know Severus is a stubborn mule who wouldn't stay in the infirmary if his arm had just been sewn back on; I have no doubt Albus has already lectured him or will lecture him about it later."

"Sorry, Hermione," Remus said contritely. "Let's go, shall we?"

"Feel better, Miss Granger. I shall try to find time to visit you," Snape promised. He leaned down and gave her a gentle kiss on the forehead, followed by a glare that promised great pain if she ever spoke of his fond gesture. Hermione smiled up at him and he stalked away.

"Well that was a ray of sunshine," Remus commented.

"Be nice," Hermione chided. "He's your friend, remember? And my surrogate father."

"He needs to take better care of himself," Remus groused. "He's begging for an early grave."

"Don't worry, we'll set him straight. Give it time." _How fucking far is this apparition point? Honestly. _

"We're almost there," Remus encouraged. Hermione started slightly. _Did I say that out loud? No…weird_.__

"Where are we going?" They had exited the castle and were trudging across the grounds.

"To my parents' old place in the country. I'll apparate us there. Just focus really hard on me, okay?"

Hermione nodded. _No problem there. _

They got to the edge of the grounds and Remus turned to her, staring into her eyes. Hermione's knees went weak and his grip tightened. His other arm snaked around her so that she was enveloped in his embrace. _Um, yeah, my knees are weak because of the potions I'm on. That's it. Sure._

"Focus, Hermione," Remus murmured.

Hermione focused. Focused on the silvery grey eyes, the placid features, the strong arms around her. _Focus less, Mya._ There was a crack and she struggled to regain her footing in the foyer of a decently sized house.

The ceilings were high and she could tell the house was sprawling. The rooms were nicely furnished from what she could see. _Very muggle modern._ Natural light filled the rooms, fading as the sun set.

"Nice place," she complimented.

"I don't come here a lot. Too damned big for one person, in my opinion. And we're in the middle of Muggle territory, so you have to be really careful." He steered her towards a door. "I'm going to put you in the master bedroom since it's on the first floor. I'll sleep in the living room so I can hear you if you need me." He handed her fresh pajamas from her bag. "I'll be back in a minute with your meds."

Hermione nodded absently looking around. The room was large, with one wall almost entirely of windows which currently had the drapes closed, and a large fireplace on the adjacent wall. The bed was huge, taking up most of the wall facing the windows. She changed quickly and sat down on the bed. _Damn, pathetic when changing is enough to make you tired. This bed is huge. Hell, this room is huge. _A pair of overstuffed black leather armchairs sat facing the fireplace, with a bearskin rug in front of them and a small table between them. Hermione peered through a doorway behind her bed to the left and saw bookcases lining the wall visible to her. Behind the bed to the right was another doorway that she assumed led to the bathroom. She slumped onto the soft comforter and waited for Remus to return.

After a moment of thought, she pulled out her cell phone from her bag and clicked it on. _Should work here, Remus said this is Muggle territory._ The start-up chime rang merrily and the phone quickly caught a signal. Hermione dialed the last number she'd called and began to speak.

After ten minutes or so, Remus entered the room with a cocktail of potions and some orange juice. He watched her silently as she laughed and hung up.

"You ready for these potions?" he asked easily.

"Yeah," she said with a grateful smile. "I was just calling to change the reservations on the island vacation I worked out for Draco and Harry. I doubt they'll be ready by next week. I had the new reservations mailed to my parents' place. I can have Harry pick them up there."

"Sounds good. They deserve it."

"Yeah, we all deserve a vacation." _Speaking of which, you plan to take a very long vacation, don't you Mya?_

She took a deep breath. "Remus, we need to talk."

"Yes," he agreed. "We do. But you need to rest first. Take your potions and when you wake up, I'll order some pizza and we'll talk. For now, relax a little, okay?"

"Yeah," Hermione yawned. "You're right." She took all her potions and drank the orange juice then burrowed beneath the covers. "What are you going to do while I sleep?"

"I'm going to get some rest too. I've been up for quite awhile."

"You can sleep in here if you want," Hermione offered. "The bed's more than large enough for two." _What are you DOING?_

"Are you sure you're comfortable with that?" he asked cautiously, eyes narrowing.

"Yeah, it's fine. Not like we've never shared a bed before," she replied lightly. _You're an idiot, Mya. Why do you like to torture yourself? Is it fun for you? You **would** be a bloody masochist, wouldn't you?_ Her body rebelled by smiling easily at Remus, even as her brain screamed warnings in languages she didn't even know.

Remus smiled at her in return, reassured by her apparent nonchalance. He disappeared into the bathroom to change into pajamas as Hermione cast a blackout spell on the room. She snuggled under the comforter, waiting for him to return.

A few moments later she heard a rustle and felt the bed shift as he settled in.

"Goodnight, Hermione," he sighed.

"G'night Remus," she replied as exhaustion swept over her.

They both fell asleep quickly, as far apart on the bed as humanly possible. _This could easily become a nightmare. _


	15. Chapter 15

Wow, I got lots of reviews, thank you all! This is going to be the longest author's note yet, but here goes.

Super-quick reviewer award goes to: Hippiechick! Yay! GISingerJayne (last chapter's super-quick reviewer) asked if you get cookies…the answer is: yes, as soon as I can afford the ingredients to bake them. Which would involve me writing less and panhandling more.

Lil: Hermione's not torturing herself about the list of the dead, she's just accepting responsibility for decisions she made. She had no choice but to do what she did, but she realizes that it doesn't absolve her from the consequences of those actions. If she were torturing herself, there'd be much more agonizing—she doesn't feel guilty, just sadly resigned to an inevitable outcome.

Ed: I'm like the Tooth Fairy of Updates. I come while you're sleeping and plant new chapters on your computer.

Ruby Malfoy, Hand3, Jayne: Thank you for wishing me well on my vacation! I decided to post this after driving for six hours just to show my appreciation.

Deus-ex-maria: I try to be several chapters in when I start posting so that I can get it up quickly. I hate waiting months for new chapters, personally. And my trick to avoid as many mistakes as possible without employing a beta-reader is to re-read each chapter twice before the final post…works fairly well, I think. Actually, author's notes are the last thing I add so they're most likely to have typos.

Terrylove: Thank you for your lovely list, it made my day! Seriously, it made me so happy. Your review was what got me writing, to link up Normal and Potholes and give some closure to the (somewhat abruptly ended) Potholes. You want to know the real reason why Snape and Hermione didn't seem as close in Normal? It's because Hermione's living with Snape's regret in life. He was okay with being her father figure, but being her father figure and confronting his ex-lover every time he saw her? I know I couldn't do it! So Hermione grew up and apart from Snape a little bit, the way kids do, but I tried to make it apparent that they still cared very much about one another. Maybe I wasn't quite as successful at that as I could have been, but in my defense I wrote Normal first, so I didn't know how close they'd end up being in Potholes.

Joots: I loved your inverse reviewing. Chapter 14 then 12 then 13. It made me smile wondering in what order you actually read those chapters.

To everyone: I'm working on that other story of mine, changing the pairing (which is testing my not-so-considerable writing skills; Snape just doesn't want to leave).

Okay, so, long author's note, short chapter. Sorry, but sixteen's a monster if it makes you feel better.

--Aimes of the Road-Trip-Budgeting-Skills

* * *

Hermione awoke groggily, fighting the lingering effects of the myriad potions she'd ingested. _I hate that fuzzy feeling…but Snape's potions are fabulous. _Her body felt relaxed and vaguely energized and her aching muscles…didn't ache anymore._ Love the lovely potions. _ She sighed drowsily and burrowed deeper under the covers, inhaling a very nice musky scent. _Love evergreen smells, too._ Remus growled deep in his throat and shifted onto his side to face her. Hermione vaguely noticed that they'd moved closer during the afternoon and her hands were now intertwined with his. She snapped into wakefulness. _Could be worse.__ You could be on top of him. No, no, no, stop thinking that immediately! _Hermione groaned and stretched, giving up on sleep as the potions began to wear off more quickly. _Really fabulous potions.___

Remus opened his eyes slowly and sighed contentedly. "You smell like lavender," he rumbled. _What the hell? I was just thinking about the way he smells…okay, maybe not so weird; we are in close quarters, after all._

Hermione grinned. "I use lavender lotion."

"Mmm. I like it."

"Glad you approve. I would've stopped wearing it if you hadn't," she replied sarcastically.

"Damn right," he replied laughingly, making no move to get out of bed. "Are you hungry? I can order some pizza."

"That sounds good." _And no, I'm not wondering how you're so familiar with Muggle things._

"What do you want on it?" He rolled out of bed with lupine grace and stretched, lengthening his spine, reaching for the ceiling. Hermione watched him for a moment before snapping out of it and responding.

"Pepperoni?"

"Sounds fine," he shrugged. "I'll go call," he added, as he left the bedroom. _Didn't volunteer any information about his ability to do things like order pizza, either. Not that ordering pizza's rocket science, but it **is** Muggle. And you're harping on this because you're trying to avoid the real issure here, Mya._

Hermione took a moment to collect her thoughts.

_Let's focus: What do you want, Mya? You want him, obviously. What do you need? You need some time away to grow a little. To discover who you are without chaos and disorder. Get away from it all for a bit. It was cool living with Callah for that middle month, when it was usually just the two of you. There was that scary moment with Lucius and Voldemort, but that's a completely different issue…of course Remus visited the cottage regularly didn't he? _

_So what's it gonna be, smarty pants?_

Hermione sighed, preparing herself for the imminent Talk. After a moment she gave up and threw herself back onto the bed with an annoyed grunt, stretching once more before sitting up.

Remus reentered the room a moment later and sat on the bed, Indian-style, mimicking her. They watched each other.

"Hey," Hermione said after a moment.

"Hey yourself," he replied.

"We need to talk," she said flatly. _Ooh. Graceful. You could be a verbal ballerina with gems like that._

"You mentioned that earlier. Which one of us should start?"

"I guess I'll go first."

"Okay." He waited.

"I've got feelings for you," she said finally, forcing herself to look him in the eyes. "But I've been very conflicted. Those feelings developed during a very difficult time in my life so I question their validity. I want…I want to be with you, but I don't want to go through life wondering whether what I was feeling was real even though I think it is." _Alright.__ That was only the hardest thing you've ever done._

He was silent for several minutes. "I have feelings for you too, Hermione," he took her hand and played with it absently, not looking at her. "I've denied them, but they're there. I worry, though. I worry that you haven't experienced enough of your life outside of Hogwarts, I worry that you only bonded with me because of what happened to you, I worry that I'm not what you really want or need."

But Hermione had shut down the minute he'd touched her. Desire fired through her almost violently.

"Hermione?" _What?_

She looked up at him and processed what he'd said. "Remus." She took a deep breath. _Finish what you started, Miss Granger. And then wonder why Snape is in your head. There's probably a procedure to remove him…but maybe you should finish your statement first._ "I'm going to live with Callah in Italy for a little while. You and I will meet again. And when we do, we'll know."

"Okay," he looked pained but tried to be supportive. "I'm glad you're exploring life on your own for a bit. I'm behind you."

"Remus," she said again, more softly. _Now that the hardest part is out of the way, speak your mind. You already decided you were going to do this; don't be a pussy. Okay, don't be more of a pussy. And perhaps consider exploring medications for your obvious ADD._ Remus was watching her.

"Before I leave, in a few days, when I'm stronger…" she faltered. "I want one night," she whispered, trying not to turn red. He blushed for her and she smiled. "It's your decision," she assured him, feeling better that he was as nervous as she.

Before he could answer, the doorbell rang.

He was off the bed like a shot, sprinting for the door like he was on the last stretch of a marathon. Hermione furrowed her eyebrows, wondering how he could get that much speed out of such an uncomfortable pretzel-like position.

_Maybe he's really flexible, like Callah. Oh Lord, Callah. Snape. Handcuffs._ Hermione was after Remus with impressive speed considering her eariler musings, trying to think about pizza, wine, and anything else that didn't involve Severus Snape naked with handcuffs and pretzel-related activities.


	16. Chapter 16

Hello all! So, we're on the home stretch: only one more chapter after this one, and this is the major one.

Joots gets last chapter's super-quick reviewer award. You're not plain at all my dear and I feel special every time you review me even if it's to say 'why the bloody hell was that chapter so short?' Though I don't think you've said that.

Ed: Update Fairy strikes again! A nice long gem for you. You may bow and pontificate at your leisure.

Lil, good to see you. Hippiechick, thank you for reviewing (fun fact: I've only posted a chapter without a review from you one time!). Hand3, because you asked me about my other story I'll give you a bit of a rundown. Ruby, I'd love to join a community but there's probably not much point since I'm leaving for Egypt in a week. Yes, everyone, my writing days are at a temporary end…as of August 12th I will be in Egypt for nine months. I'll try to do some writing while I'm there, but don't hold me to it.

And the summary, as promised: So, I kinda got to thinking (as I was writing in Callah's occupation) Hermione would make a pretty good spy, right? I mean, she's smart, courageous, and has major saving the world potential. And that's what I wrote. I actually wrote it at the same time I wrote this story, but it's not at all related except for that bit. For the pairing: I chose to switch it over to Remus/Hermione, although I'm toying with the idea of posting the original at a later date. Like while I'm abroad and not writing anything new. As a thank you to everyone who's reviewed me or given me feedback on this as-yet-unnamed story, I'm posting the first chapter tonight, along with this monster. It's Snarky overload! (Hey Ed, it's like your entire top row of teeth fell out and you're getting ten bucks per tooth, right? Makes for a lumpy pillow, though, or so I would imagine.)

So, here is the longest chapter I've ever written. Check out my new story too if you're bored and have nothing better to do!

Aimes-Who-Has-Not-Yet-Packed-To-Leave-The-Country-For-A-Year

PS—I jumped through hoops to work in some action, Ruby. Enjoy.

* * *

Four days had passed in a blur for Hermione. She spent most of her time sleeping, or as she liked to call it, 'recuperating.' Her friends had visited, even Snape had stopped by, and Callah had been released from the infirmary. This was her last night staying with Remus. Callah had scoped out and leased a roomy villa in Italy and they were to leave together tomorrow. Dumbledore had provided a glowing letter of recommendation to the Institute for Archaeological Studies and they had welcomed Hermione with open arms and enviable remuneration. _Life's just about set, then. Ah, fuck the bullshit. What's going to happen tonight?_ She tapped her fingers on her leg impatiently as she sat on a leather armchair in the den, staring out the windows at the densely wooded area behind the house. _Should've slept longer.__ Wouldn't have had to sit here thinking._

It was eleven a.m. and Remus had left half an hour earlier to do some errands. Hermione had offered to accompany him but he'd simply smiled and declined, telling her to relax, watch a movie, drink some lemonade. He left and she began to stew. At first she tried to occupy her time, making Nicaraguan Iced Tea, reading a random paperback novel she'd found in the den, and generally puttering, but she'd quickly given up in favor of brooding. With a start she realized that if what she wanted to happen _did_ happen she needed to be appropriately dressed. So she did the only thing she could: she flooed Ginny. Callah, she suspected, would look at her blankly if she mentioned clothes and makeup.

Ginny had long suspected the attraction and seemed unfazed when Hermione admitted it. _Seems like the entire bloody planet knows.__ Why is that always the case? I mean, it's not like I go around with a picture of him pasted to my textbooks or anything. Sure, you could say people are perceptive, but let's face it, people are damned stupid. They never notice when you want them to shut up but they notice a very unlikely attraction between two people who are hardly ever seen together in public._

Ginny's response to Hermione's plea for a little help with her appearance was a calm interest, and she and Hermione retreated to the breakfast table to talk. _Thank god this place is hooked up for floo._

"What, exactly, do you want to do with your appearance?" Ginny queried.

"I don't know. Look good, I guess," Hermione replied. _I'm the brains, Gin. No one would ever encourage me to be a fashion designer._

"Well, what do you think is wrong with your appearance?"

"I don't know. That's why I called you," Hermione replied with gritted teeth.

Ginny laughed. "What I'm trying to say, Hermione, is you look good as it is. Let your hair run loose, the curls have eased up from bushy to riotous. Wear green, it complements the shades of brown in your skin, eyes, and hair. Be comfortable—you don't want to be worrying about how much the skirt is digging into you when you should be focusing on him. I'd suggest an emerald green skirt with a really light flare—nothing penciled, it's too business-y. A black shirt in whatever style pleases you, black sandals, maybe some lip gloss. You're a pretty girl, 'Mione, no worries there. You don't really need to go to extremes with makeovers; you'd end up looking good of course, but it's nothing you couldn't do on your own if you just pick colors that complement you and don't make the typical mistakes." She took a bite of one of the cookies Hermione had set out and sipped at her iced tea.

"Which are?" Hermione took deep breaths. _You will not strangle her. You will not strangle her._

"Wearing incredibly elaborate lingerie, caking yourself with makeup, trying to go vampy seductress. It's not you, and he'll know it. Just go with the outfit I recommended, wear basic black underwear with some nice lacy embellishments, slap on some eyeliner and lip gloss, and remember that he wants you no matter what you look like. And he's seen you looking all kinds of terrible." _Thanks for the reminder. This was ever so helpful. _

"Christ, I had you come all the way here to do some Freudian psychoanalysis crap? 'Trust in your own beauty to shine through.' We really could've saved time by doing this over the network, you know. Or not doing it at all."

"Yes, but then I wouldn't have gotten your iced tea and cookies," Ginny replied placidly, rising and strolling to the fireplace in the living room. She turned for just a moment. "Mione?"

"Yeah?"

"Maybe consider what you're actually worried about. It's not your looks." She turned back to the fireplace and grabbed some powder. "Good luck!" she said cheerfully, and was gone.

Hermione slouched back into the kitchen. She was halfway there when she reconsidered and headed for the master bedroom. _Bath__ will do nicely._ She filled the huge marble tub with water and sage bubble bath. _Sage bubble bath?__ Okay, I admit that rose might be too girly, but what about lavender or ocean spray or one of those other nice manufactured unisex scents? Besides, isn't bubble bath girly by definition? Then again, at least he's got bubble bath._ She eased herself into the water and sighed. _Snape__ had bubble bath too. Or he made some for me. He is a potions master, after all, can't forget that. Smelled like…hell if I remember._

"What I'm really worried about," she mused aloud. _Well it's sort of obvious, right? I mean, I haven't been with anyone since Dayrin, as much as I've thought about it, and before him…well it's been awhile to say the least. So I pretty much have no idea what I'm doing._

"Which I despise," she growled, slipping beneath the bubbles. _In an ideal world, he'd realize how squeamish I am and he'd take the lead for me. Then again, he's probably as nervous as I am. Shit, I'm going pruny._

She drained the bath and took a quick shower, washing her hair and using a quick spell to rid herself of the fur on her legs. _Damn, I'm starting to look like an ape. Of course who the hell thinks about shaving when they're lying in a hospital bed? Or charming away hair in this case. _She zapped her underarms and stepped out of the steamy enclosure, wrapping a large towel around herself. For a moment, she contemplated herself in the slightly foggy mirror. _Average height, average weight, curvier than some, less curvy than some, a study in browns.__ Curly brown hair, brown eyes with tan flecks that I could call gold to make myself feel better… tanned brown skin which would horrify my cancer-phobic mother were she alive to comment… all in all, I'm very... brown. And average. Which is not a bad thing. I don't look like some messed up Barbie doll or a cow or an Oompa Loompa or anything. I'm attractive in my own way. A very brown way. Scarred brown way._

The scars did not embarrass her and she did not think they affected her looks one way or another, really. They were memories burned onto skin—reminders of hell or testaments to strength, depending on who was looking. She herself thought of them as physical reminders of the plentiful life experience she had racked up. Hermione Granger was physically not even in her twenties. Spiritually, she'd passed one hundred. She toweled herself off and dried her hair. A quick tug of her hairbrush and she left it to run loose as Ginny had suggested. Her eyes had wandered to the Swiss Army watch her father had given her before she'd entered Hogwarts and she'd been shocked by how late it was: almost five o'clock. _Remus__ must be back by now._ Still, she did not rush. As though reading her mind, there was a knock on the door.

"Hermione? I'm making dinner, it'll be ready in an hour, okay?"

"Fantastic. Should I dress for dinner?"

"That would be nice," he replied. _That would mean he's cooking something special. _She heard his footsteps retreat and turned back to the mirror, taking a deep breath. _Let's go then._ She moisturized her entire body before picking up the underwear she'd transfigured while the bath was running. They were basic black and satin. The underwear was a simple string bikini cut and the bra was an equally simple demi-cup. Gazing into the mirror and pronouncing herself satisfied, she walked back out to the bedroom. She saw a bag next to her bed that she had not noticed when entering. _Then again, I was a bit preoccupied._

She picked it up and saw a note from Ginny pinned to it.

**_Mione_****_—_**

**_Why waste time transfiguring clothes when you've got friends to do it for you? _**

**_Ginny_**

Hermione smiled and pulled out an emerald green knee-length skirt that flared at the hips. The material felt like pure silk. She pulled it on quickly, noting how well it fit. Next out of the bag came a black clingy shirt that hugged her body. It was a tank top with scraps of material hanging from the shoulders and a deeply v-cut neck. Hermione reminded herself to bake Ginny more cookies as she picked up the bag to put it in the closet. The weight revealed that she had not emptied the bag completely. She shook it out and a pair of simple black slip-on sandals and a pair of dangling silver earrings with green stones fell out. A quick check in the bathroom mirror confirmed that she looked good. _Add the eyeliner and a touch of lip gloss and we're done!_ She glanced at her watch and noted that fifty minutes had passed. With a smile she proceeded to the kitchen. _You look great, Mya. Go get 'em, tiger._

"Hey," she greeted Remus. His back was to her but she noticed he had changed into loose khakis and a silver-grey shirt. He turned and she saw that the shirt caught his eyes and made them look radiant. _Ouch. Don't know if I could date someone that dresses better than me. Of course you're not dating. You're going to __Italy__. Tomorrow. And the clothes won't stay on him that long, right?_

"You look nice," he said sweetly, fingering her hair.

"You look pretty good too, if you couldn't tell from the way I was staring," she replied wryly. _Can't let it get too serious now, can I?_

"Dinner's almost ready. Want some wine?"

"I'd love some, thank you." He pulled out a glass and poured for her. "White merlot? Didn't even know it existed," she said curiously. She sipped at it. "Wow, that's really good."

"I'm glad you like it," Remus said with a grin. "What did you do today?"

"Oh, read a bit, took a bath, you know." _Had a full mental break._

"Good, I'm glad you relaxed." He checked something in the oven. "Dinner's ready, go have a seat, I'll serve."

"Are you sure you don't want help?" she offered. He shooed her out of the kitchen. _Guess not._

She sat at the table, which, she noticed, had been set with the good china. _Oh yeah, only the good stuff for me. _

Remus entered with salad and served her and himself before sitting.

"Thank you," Hermione said with a smile. _Way to jump start__ the conversation. Me, nervous? Whatever do you mean?_ She sipped at her wine nervously. _Okay, maybe a little._

Hermione dug into the salad, not meeting his eyes.

"Do you like Michael Crichton?" Hermione started at the question. He was watching her with gentle amusement in his eyes.

"Come again?"

"Crichton. The novel you were reading," he reminded her, gesturing at the paperback where it rested on the kitchen counter.

"Oh. Well, yes, usually. Some work is better than others. Same as any author. In his case, I'd have to say I'm particularly fond of 'Timeline' and 'Congo.'"

"I was too. Is that the particular genre of Muggle literature you tend toward?"

Suddenly, she relaxed. Books she could discuss without a problem.

"I tend toward everything. I enjoy mysteries, thrillers, random fiction literature, nonfiction, whatever. I read Stephen King and Salman Rushdie and everything in between."

"I've always been a fan of Rushdie," he encouraged. "My favorite book is 'The Ground Beneath Her Feet.'"

"Mine too!" she looked at him incredulously. "Everyone says his best work was 'Satanic Verses' or 'Midnight's Children' but I loved 'Ground Beneath Her Feet.' Something about the language and the way the characters were so…real."

"I liked the thought of a flawed narrator. I mean, he's telling a love story about the man everyone envied and the woman he himself was in love with."

The conversation continued in that general direction till they were finished with their salads. He rose and picked up their plates with one hand, gently forcing her back into her chair with his free hand when she tried to help. _Something smells damn good._

A plate of beef filets, sautéed mushrooms, and duchess potatoes was placed in front of her.

"Wow," she said, impressed. _Very eloquent, Mya._ "It looks delicious, Remus. You really didn't have to go to all this trouble. Thank you."

"I wanted to do this for you," he admonished. "Stop thanking me, you sound like a broken record." Hermione made a face at him and dug into the food. The conversation and the wine flowed.

Later:

"I'm a Wagenseil person," Hermione shrugged. "His arrangements were more inspired, in my opinion."

"You can't deny the genius behind Handel's Concertos. He was one of the few major composers to write directly for the instrument," Remus argued.

"Yes, and he's recognized for his contributions. Wagenseil captured a different side of the music, though. I mean let's face it: Handel's stuff was the same old music rewritten and repackaged for the harp. Wagenseil's stuff was a complete break from that," Hermione countered.

"How do you know so much about harp orchestral pieces, anyways?" Remus asked curiously, setting a strawberry zabaglione before her.

"My mum was obsessed with harpistry. What about you?"

"I took lessons when I was a kid," he admitted sheepishly. Hermione's eyes widened.

"Really? That's amazing! I'll have to get you drunk and convince you to play for me," she teased.

"For you, I don't think I'd have to be drunk," he replied, popping a strawberry in her mouth as he went back to his seat. "You'd just have to kiss me," he mumbled almost inaudibly. _Bet he thought I didn't hear that._

"Let's test that hypothesis," she whispered and the atmosphere shifted noticeably. He was watching her, waiting, silent. _So much for him making this easy for me._

Hermione stood and moved around the table to stand in front of him. He'd pushed his chair away from the table and was leaning back to look up at her. With a gentle smile she leaned down and kissed him, lowering herself to straddle him. Remus' arms went around her settling on her waist as she gripped his face with cool hands. _Perfect._

He pulled back and began to kiss along her neck as her hands dropped to her shoulders. _I've waited bloody long enough for this._ He lingered on the pulse on her throat, tasting her heartbeat, reveling in the feel of her. Remus broke away long enough to whisper in her ear.

"Hermione, are you sure you want this?"

"Yes," she replied breathlessly. _Bloody hell, what do you want, a damned invitation? I would be happy to give you one. Later. _

"Then maybe we should move this to the bedroom." He stood effortlessly and Hermione was reminded of the power beneath his surface. _Werewolf.__ Most civilized man I know, and he's a werewolf._ She began nibbling on his neck as he carried her and her legs wrapped around his waist. She felt his heartbeat quicken and he gave a low growl deep in his throat. _I spend a lot of time with my legs wrapped around his waist. Actually, no, I don't spend nearly enough time with my legs wrapped around his waist._

He set her down on the bed and drank in the sight of her as she gazed up at him. _What's that expression? Feast for a starving man? I suspect that I'm the feast._ Slowly, tentatively, he ran a hand down her side and slipped it under her shirt. Hermione lifted her arms accommodatingly and he tugged it up and off her. His breath hitched as he saw the black satin.

"You're beautiful," he murmured. Hermione blushed and didn't reply. "What's this?" he teased. "I thought you were completely confident in yourself."

"If by myself you mean my brain, yes. Everyone's got their hang-ups," she replied.

Remus pulled her to her feet and slid the skirt down her hips. "Maybe so, but I don't think you have anything to worry about." His hands skimmed her body. "Beautiful," he said again, almost to himself.

"Why are you still clothed?"

"So curious, always the questions. I'm still clothed because I was otherwise occupied with unclothing you, sweetness."

"I'm an equal opportunity nudist. You're going to have to lose some layers, mate." She'd shifted to kneel on the bed, facing him where he stood. Her hands were already unbuttoning his shirt. She pulled it off him and splayed her hands on his chest. _Wow. Damn, you're getting exponentially less creative with your inner dialogue, Mya. When you're done shagging him silly, you should consider that. Expand your vocabulary. Introduce some fun words. Snausages. Papoose. Oh, holy fuck!_ Remus had leaned down to suck on the base of her neck as he reached around to unhook her bra. _Okay, hot man now, personal critique later._ Hermione slipped her fingers into his belt, unclasping it quickly and opening his pants. She slid them down his legs, leaving him clad only in boxers. _Which makes us even since I now have only my panties on._

Remus pulled back, tracing one of her whip scars down her back and around her torso.

"Bellatrix's whip," she breathed. "Wrapped all the way around me." He bent to lick along its path. Hermione gasped and arched toward him. He continued with his slow exploration of her body.

"Remus," she whispered. _ He has scars too._ Hermione touched a thin white line on his side.

"Other werewolves don't always play fair," he said huskily. Her wandering hands found scar tissue on his back. Most of his other scars were barely noticeable. Hermione looked up at him curiously.

"The original bite. Nearly killed me."

"Glad it didn't. Wouldn't be able to have my wicked way with you if it had." She hooked her fingers in his boxers and tugged, leaving him exposed. Hermione kissed down his chest, tasting his stomach, darting her tongue in his navel. Remus groaned and gripped her shoulders convulsively.

With a quick glance upward, she took the tip of him in her mouth and sucked gently. His answering moan encouraged her and she took him in as far as she could and began to suck on him, using her tongue to tease him. Her hands continued to wander, squeezing his ass, caressing his testicles. His breathing quickened as she pressed on his most sensitive areas and he came, gasping her name. She swallowed his come, waiting patiently till he was finished. _How did that get me so turned on?_ Hermione felt almost as though she'd come as well, but any questions were swept away as he pulled her into a fiery kiss.

He slid two fingers into her and began to stroke her, slowly. Hermione whimpered, pressing her body against him. _When, exactly, did my undies come off? Hell if I care._ Remus dipped his head to suck on her breasts, rolling the nipples in his mouth before pulling back and blowing gently on them. He found himself enjoying the sounds of pleasure she made and he let his mouth travel her body, finding more spots that made her squeak with pleasure.

His mouth wandered ever lower and he gently pushed her back on the bed, kneeling in front of it. He kissed her inner thighs and licked his way to her centre. Hermione let out a ragged cry as his mouth came into contact with her heated flesh. His tongue began to trace patterns on her clit and his fingers continued to explore her recesses. He sucked hard on her clit and she arched her back off the bed.

"Remus," she cried out as she came, the orgasm rushing over her. Remus felt sparks run through him as he lifted his head and began kissing his way up her body.

He kissed her passionately, capturing her wrists above her head and positioning himself above her, trying to give her time to prepare, skimming his free hand down her body.

Hermione froze. _No. Not now. This is not happening. You are finally getting action from the man you fancy and you're going mental. _She desperately tried to talk herself down but her entire body clenched, remembering her wrists bound above her head and Dayrin Lestrange pressing her into the wall as he skimmed his hand down her side. _He is not Dayrin Lestrange, he's Remus Lupin and he's wonderful._ The scars on her back began to ache and she saw the look in Dayrin's eyes as he thrust into her, slamming her against the stone wall.

Remus had gone still above her and was looking down at her with concern. Hermione's eyes were squeezed shut and she'd begun trembling. It clicked for him and he released her hands instantly and rolled off to the side, pulling her into his arms.

"Shh, Hermione, it's okay. We don't have to do this if you're not ready. It's okay sweetheart. I'm not going to hurt you, I'd never hurt you." He tightened his arms around her protectively.

"I'm sorry, Remus," she whispered into his chest. _So much for not backing out at the last second._His throat caught at her words.

"Never apologize," he said fiercely. "I shouldn't have let it go this far, sweetness, I should have known. It's been less than a year since he hurt you, I should have realized it was too soon."

"Not your fault," she mumbled. "I _was_ more or less throwing myself at you. I just…I…"

"I know, sweetness." His hands stroked her back soothingly and he dropped light kisses on the top of her head. "Don't be sorry. We enjoyed ourselves and we hit our limit." He pulled the covers over them.

"Thank you," she murmured. "Are you going to leave me tonight?" _What the hell possessed you to ask that? Are you a cheap romance novel heroine? _

"No, sweetness, I'm not going to leave you. I'm going to sleep right here with your beautiful body in my arms and I'm going to wake up that way too. There is nowhere in the universe I'd rather be." _Maybe you are a cheap romance novel heroine. Not a bad place to be though._

Still sated from her earlier orgasm and exhausted from the panicked fear of the flashback, Hermione began to drift. "You're amazing," she sighed. "I got pretty lucky to snag someone like you." _I love you. But Callah and Severus were right: they said I needed to experience life on my own…this proves it. I've got to move past this little roadblock if we're ever to have the relationship I want us to have. And we **will** have it. Just not yet. _With that thought, she fell asleep.

"Sleep, sweetness," he rumbled mildly, fingering her curly hair. Their naked bodies pressed together and though the desire was there, it was overpowered by a need to take care of her, to protect her. He pulled her closer and breathed in the citrus smell of her hair, mixing with the sage of the bubble bath and the lavender of her lotion. All brought together by the particular scent of her, a scent most would not notice but that his heightened senses could identify in a crowded room.

This was best, he decided. If they'd kept going he would not have been able to let her go come morning. And she had to go, that much was sure. She was not truly recovered from what had happened to her. She deserved time to discover herself. Not that it would stop him from writing with excessive frequency. He was ready to let her go because he loved her but he clung to her for the same reason. He let himself sleep, content with the woman in his arms and the knowledge that one day (hopefully one day soon) he would see her again. And when he did he had every intention of never letting her go.


	17. Chapter 17

Well, this is it. The end. I've only got two or three reviews on my new story (If It Were Easy They'd Call It Tae Kwon Do), but I'll post a new chapter of that tonight anyways, if only for those three reviewers.

Ed got cheeky and hinted for a quick update, so here it is. Sadly it's only an epilogue to wrap things up neatly and set up 'Normal' but it's better than nothing.

A lot of people (well, Joots and Ruby) have asked me what I'll do while I'm in Egypt. By my calculations I'll get at least six chapters of the new story up before I go. There will be two or three weeks of silence and then I'll post again (have to get internet set up in my apartment). However, I probably won't be writing anything new ('Tae Kwon Do' is already mostly written and I can finish it and start proofing it before I go). I say probably because you never ever know with me. I started writing initially because I lost a bet and kept going because people seemed to want more. Thus, you might get a new story if feel guilty because I'm being barraged by emails from people who want more after 'Tae Kwon Do' is finished (or hell, while 'Tae Kwon Do' is being posted, for that matter).

So, cheeky little Ed is my super-quick reviewer from last chapter. Still can't afford cookie ingredients, sorry.

Lil, good to see you as usual. Draccy, welcome back, I've missed you! For the record, Hermione was never going to go all the way (mainly because I'd written out that possibility in 'Normal'). I conveniently remembered my timeline as I wrote the scene and realized that a normal healthy person would not be jumping into the sack anyways, so it all worked out. Milli survived, though Blaise and Fred both died. I didn't really discuss the other characters because my focus has always been Hermione and I didn't want it to get too convoluted with multiple character focuses. Ruby, I did my best to stay within the site guidelines, actually, in terms of the sex scene. I'd hate to get kicked off or anything.

Finally, before I go, I've got to give three final hugs. For Avestia and GISingerJayne, my first reviewers ever (on 'Normal'), though I don't see Avestia anymore. Thanks for sticking with me Jayne, it means the world to me. Also, thanks to J, without whom I'd never have started writing (alcoholpokerJ=Aimes losing multiple bets). Finally, thanks to Terrylove, who sent me a very sad note about giving up on me after I'd finished 'Potholes' and got too lazy to write this story. If not for that review, this story would never have gone up.

It's been fun!

--Aimes

* * *

**Dearest Remus,**

**I received your last letter! I loved the pictures of you and Severus in ****Ireland****. I'm glad you're forcing him to get out, even if it was reconnaissance on a Deatheater. I miss you terribly, but Dumbledore said that I can't see you more frequently as long as I'm outside the sphere of protection of the ****UK****. **

**I understand, I suppose. You've gained some fame hunting Deatheaters worldwide. As long as I'm relatively out in the open we run the risk of being seen together and then I'm a liability for you. I'm already at enough risk being remembered as Harry and Ron's best friend and one of the planners of the Battle of Hogwarts (isn't that a pretentious name for it?). All of which more or less amounts to me sleeping alone at night with the memory of our goodbye kiss and some thermal underwear to keep me warm. Not exactly what I had in mind for this long. But Severus tells me that there are only a few Deatheaters left so you're making great progress. **

**After almost a year and a half here, I'm well settled in. Callah and I are having a great time and she sends her love. On the weekends we visit other places by car. Mini-road trips to expand our horizons. When it comes to female bonding, Muggles got it right. Just us, the country roads, and lots and lots of cheesy pop music. **

**Last weekend we went to a small village outside of ****Florence****. It was a market day and everyone in town was out. Callah and I bought fresh vegetables and fruit and we took lots of pictures. I enclosed some for you. The weather was so beautiful—odd for this time of year. We ended up sleeping in a field under the stars (which is a very-un-Hermione-like thing to do, I'm sure you'll agree). I've been doing a lot of un-Hermione-like things lately. Maybe it's Callah, maybe it's Italy, maybe Ron and Harry finally rubbed off on me, maybe we both forgot our credit cards and spent all our money drinking so we barely had enough to get gas for the drive home. I wish you were here doing un-Hermione-like things with us.**

**Harry visited last week. He and Draco are doing quite well and they make a sickeningly cute couple. They stayed for a few days, left this morning, and I miss them already! Harry told me that Ron and Milli are engaged. I can't wait to attend the wedding; though I've already refused to be in it. I've worn one taffeta bridesmaid dress too many! (I still wonder what on earth Luna was thinking. But then, it is Luna.) They're great for each other. Draco, our resident gossip, filled us in on all the dirt. I hear Ginny's dating Neville! I'm glad for her; she was so low after Blaise died.**

**Work is going fantastically. I'm researching magical methods of the ancient Romans and it's so interesting! I refuse to waste valuable parchment space boring you to tears with it, though. **

**All in all, the only thing missing here is…you.**

**Take care, and remember: that olive oil that started the grease fire that killed your takeout guy who was supposed to bring you dinner forcing you to starve that night probably came from somewhere near here.**

**All my best,**

**Hermione**


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